To Wish one Could Forget
by Twilight Author488
Summary: Harry's summer is interrupted when he learns he must spend most of it with his most hated professor, while being forced to relive his worst memories. PG13 because of violence.
1. Chapter 1: Try Not to Remember

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the character in this story. All belong to J.K. Rowling, and really, do you really think I could come up with something like that?  
  
By the way, I could really use some help from readers! This is my first time writing!  
  
Chapter 1: Try Not to Remember  
  
Harry was at home in his room when the owl came. Before that, he had been in a silent reverie with his thoughts mostly on what had happened in the past few months. Thinking about how unfair life was to him, all the cards that had been dealt to him. Without him really registering it, a brown school owl flew into his bedroom.  
  
He thought about just ignoring it, sending the owl back to where it had come. He had kept the order up to date, so what would they be sending to him? But in the end, he was too curious, and opened the letter. He nearly had a fit when he saw what it said:  
  
Dear Mr. Potter,  
  
I am writing to inform you that a member of the Order will be arriving to escort you to Headquarters. The reason for your early removal from your relatives' house is that I feel it is imperative that you practice occlumency.  
  
Be ready by 12:00 tomorrow for your escort. You will floo to headquarters, as it is much simpler than the actions took last year.  
  
In good health, Prof. Albus Dumbledore, Headmaster of Hogwarts, Order of Merlin 1st Class  
  
Harry couldn't believe it. He had to go back to Grimmuald Place, and he had to resume occlumency! Could life get any worse? Of all the people he did not want to see, Professor Snape was number one on his list. Feeling it was useless to argue anyway, he packed his trunk, then went to tell his Aunt and Uncle the news.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Sorry it's so short. But I am going to update asap. I just wanted to get started!  
  
Please R/r 


	2. Chapter 2: More to Deal With

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the character in this story. All belong to J.K. Rowling, and really, do you really think I could come up with something like that?  
  
By the way, do I have to put a disclaimer on every chapter? Warning: OOTP spoilers AND THIS IS NOT GOING TO BE A SLASH!  
  
Chapter Two: More to Deal With  
  
At noon, Harry was waiting by the fireplace for his escort to arrive. His relatives had some "errands" to attend to, and now were conveniently gone. Harry didn't want to go back to Grimmauld Place; for once in his life he would have rather stayed at the Dursleys'. There were too many memories there, too many things that he was trying to escape at the moment. His mind was screaming, but on the outside, he appeared calm and yet somehow lost.  
  
There was suddenly a burst of green light and a dark, sinister figure stepped out of the fireplace. Harry was struck numb as to who it was that stepped out before him. It was none other than the infamous Severus Snape himself.  
  
"Potter, wipe that stupid look off your face! And get your things. You're to come with me."  
  
"I don't think so!" Harry snapped back.  
  
"Potter! I will not tolerate this insubordination! You will come with me this instant, under Professor Dumbledore's orders!"  
  
"You can tell the headmaster that I will gladly be staying here until someone else comes. I refuse to go with you"  
  
"You are coming now, or else."  
  
"Yeah right."  
  
"You asked for it, boy!" In the blink of an eye, Snape pulled out his wand and muttered an incantation. It was the last thing Harry remembered before falling to the ground, stunned.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
** But wait! There's more! I decided to go ahead and write another chapter!!*** 


	3. Chapter 3: Forced to Remember

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in this story. All belong to J.K. Rowling, and really, do you really think I could come up with something like that?  
  
Chapter Three: Forced to Remember  
  
Harry awoke seated on a couch in Grimmauld Place. He mentally sighed. This was not going well at all. He sensed movement nearby and turned his head to see Snape staring at him. "You shouldn't have tried to pull any or your stupid stunts with me," he said, sneering.  
  
"Leave me alone," Harry snapped.  
  
"Oh yes, let's everyone feel sorry for the Gryffindor Golden Boy!"  
  
"We aren't in school! I don't have to listen to your mouth right now!"  
  
"That's where you're wrong, Potter! You are to be taught occlumency this summer. Trust me, I did not jump at the opportunity, but as this is the task to which I was assigned, I will complete it."  
  
"Loser," Harry muttered.  
  
"I am sure you will be flattered to know how much Professor Dumbledore thinks of you. He has cleared through the ministry a document that says you are allowed to use magic out of school. Fudge is afraid to deny Dumbledore any request, and therefore you are allowed to use your wand against me in occlumency."  
  
"Oh joy." Harry responded unenthusiastically.  
  
"Oh, bloody hell," Snape muttered. "Legilimens!"  
  
Harry's mind raced. He saw the Department of Mysteries again. Sirius Black falling behind the veil. Bellatrix Lestrange being cursed by his own hand after first taunting him with useless babble. The curse ended with that memory.  
  
"You used an unforgivable?" It was a question, and yet a statement of surprise.  
  
"I said 'Leave me alone'!"  
  
"Legilimens!"  
  
Harry was at the cemetery once more, a place that haunted his waking dreams. Cedric Diggory pleading with Harry to take his body back. Harry felt the pain of the Cruciatus curse, and found that he was screaming not only in his head, but out loud. Snape released his mind again.  
  
"You are truly weak minded, Potter," Snape mocked, then turned and stalked off, leaving Harry in physical pain and misery. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Ok, so it sucks so far! It will get better (I HOPE!!!) R/r please! 


	4. Chapter 4: A Living Nightmare

Disclaimer: In no way shape or form do I own Harry Potter or any of his fellow characters in this story. All belong to J.K. Rowling.  
  
Good Grief, here it goes again! Thanks to all my reviewers (even if there aren't many of you all). And I like constructive criticism, so feel free to review my stories!  
  
Chapter Four: A Living Nightmare  
  
Harry stayed in his usual room the rest of the afternoon. He did not want to see Snape's sniveling face anymore. He was so wrapped in his own self- pity that it took him a while to notice a letter sitting on the table of the room. When he finally did notice, he wasted no time in seeing who it was from.  
  
The letter was addressed to him, and the handwriting looked like it was that of Remus. He nimbly tore the envelope open and began reading the letter:  
  
Harry,  
  
I am terribly sorry, but I am afraid that we cannot be there with you for the first few weeks you will be staying at Grimmauld Place. I and most of the rest of the Order will be attending to recruiting business, and I am also trying to work on a protection right for werewolves. Wish me luck.  
  
I am afraid the only person who will be staying in Professor Snape, and Dumbledore feels it would be a good opportunity for you to work on occlumency. I truly am sorry about you having to return to the headquarters so soon. I am sure Snape will have already told you, but you are not allowed to write to anyone until we return. You will see Ron and Hermione as soon as we return. Look on the bright side, you can use magic! Just don't get caught pulling any pranks on your Professor.  
  
Stay well and See You Soon!  
  
Remus Lupin.  
  
Harry was in utter shock, to say the least. Not only was he to practice occlumency with Snape, but he and Snape were the only two in the whole house, not counting Mrs. Black's Portrait, which had sat silent since he had arrived. Harry felt utterly alone and shut off from everyone. His only communication would be with his most horrible professor imaginable.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Harry had not eaten anything the entire day, after being denied food at the Dursleys'. So at 6 o'clock, he was rather hungry. Thinking it best to try to avoid Snape, he snuck into the kitchen and took a look in the pantry. He found bread and peanut butter and decided that would hold him over for the time being. He was about to back out of the pantry when he heard a voice behind him. "Sneaking in for a snack, I assume?" Snape asked out of nowhere.  
  
"I'm hungry," Harry simply responded.  
  
"Dinner was thirty minutes ago."  
  
"I wasn't informed of that."  
  
"Well, now you are. Get out."  
  
"I'm still hungry."  
  
"Not my problem. You can go to bed now for all I care. And, just so you know, you are making your own meals. That house elf of Black's crawled into the attic and died."  
  
Harry stepped out of the pantry and trudged out of the kitchen. "And don't forget to clear your mind," Snape called after him.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Harry was asleep now at about nine o'clock. He had sent Hedwig to Hogwarts earlier that evening and told her to come back in a few weeks. Afterwards, he had fallen asleep on the soft covers, not bothering to worry about occlumency or clearing his mind.  
  
His dreams were horrible. He was in a dark dungeon, surrounded by Death Eaters. He was also kneeling alongside people he should have known. Voldemort was standing in front of him, wand poised for action.  
  
"You all should have joined the winning side," he taunted.  
  
"I did," Harry found himself saying. "It's against you."  
  
"You will soon see how wrong you mortals are." Voldemort yelled "Crucio!" and Harry was engulfed in a red hot pain. He ached all over and the pain was almost unbearable. He was continuously cursed for what seemed like forever, until his body fell onto the floor into an almost comatose state. Harry uttered a final scream before a killing curse was sent in his direction, and he awoke in his bed.  
  
Snape was standing over him, and as soon as his eyes had opened, he was grabbed out of bed and thrown against a wall. "I told you to clear your mind!" Snape roared.  
  
Harry tried to respond, but was still in too much pain. "Well? No excuses?"  
  
Harry opened his mouth to say something, than closed it back. 'Someone save me from this pain,' he thought. And then collapsed in front of Snape in a dead faint.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
You know, I've always hated how people end like this. But, now I see how fun it is to leave readers hanging. (No offense!) Please r/r.  
  
I'll write asap, but with school, that might not be till Friday or Saturday. 


	5. Chapter 5: To Wake Up

Disclaimer: Again, none of these characters belong to me!  
  
Could someone tell me how to use italics? Well, since you all were so anxious about the cliffhanger, I decided to update a little earlier than originally planned. So here you go, have fun, but don't get your hopes up!  
  
Chapter 5: To Wake Up  
  
Harry was in so much pain that he didn't think he could manage to open his eyes. He tried, nonetheless, and succeeded in managing to crack them enough to allow a little vision. The room he was in was dark, which was well enough for him. And as far as he could tell, there were two people in the room with him. Snape, probably ready to tell him off for not clearing his mind, and someone else who he wasn't sure of.  
  
"Well, Mr. Potter, are you finally with us again?" came a more feminine voice than Snape's.  
  
Harry managed a nod of his head, still not trusting himself to talk. "You are very lucky," she continued. "You managed to suffer a very powerful cruciatus curse. You are lucky there was little damage, and you should recover soon enough." Harry mentally sighed, waiting for his reprimanding. "As for me, I'm leaving. Try to stay well for the rest of the summer, Mr. Potter." And with that, she opened the door and left him alone with Snape.  
  
Harry turned his head away and closed his eyes, hoping Snape would just go away and tell him off later. No such luck. "So, Potter, still haven't learned your lesson, have you?" No answer. "I fear that if you don't learn soon, I will have to teach you the hard way."  
  
"I just forgot," Harry said quietly.  
  
"Forgot? Do you think the Dark Lord forgets these things? Do you realize the jeopardy you could be putting the Order in every time you forget? Or maybe you want to see the rest of your friends die like that mutt just because of your own stupidity."  
  
"Just shut up!" Harry yelled, sitting up too quickly and causing his head to spin immensely. The look on Snape's face said that he had gone too far.  
  
"You will learn to respect me, you worthless boy." Snape held out his wand threateningly. "Silencio."  
  
Harry couldn't talk anymore. Although he would have preferred to talk, he was better off than he would have thought.  
  
"Now you will listen to me," Snape began. "You can learn this lesson the easy way. Or, since Professor Dumbledore is gone for the time being, I can instill the lesson in you in a much more, permanent, way. Understand." Harry nodded. "And don't think I won't, boy. I will teach you to clear your mind, or you may end up regretting it in the end. You could expose us all. And I am not about to put all my work on the line because of you."  
  
Snape turned and began to leave. Before he left the room, he turned, aimed his wand, and muttered "Finite incantartum."  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~  
  
Short, but hold on a minute. Tell me what you think!  
  
Well, I think I'm going to try something new here. Let's pick your own plot. I had an idea, but I don't think I like it anymore. Vote on the one you want the most.  
  
Here are your choices:  
  
Snape ends up having to curse Harry and makes his life a living hell until the order returns.  
  
Snape and Harry get along, and Harry eventually learns Occlumency (with a lot of hard work on both counts).  
  
Harry doesn't learn and really does seriously jeopardize the order.  
  
Or if you can think of a plot you want and does not include slash or severitus, go ahead. Have fun.  
  
I'll be waiting! 


	6. Chapter 6: A Hard Lesson to Learn

Disclaimer: I own nothing!  
  
Author's note: Sorry I took so long, but I have had a lot of school work, especially with exams coming up. I am going to try and be more consistent with my updates. And to all my faithful reviewers and readers, thanks for answering my little survey and for giving such great reviews. For those of you who don't like it, well, you're entitled to your opinion, and you don't have to read it anymore.  
  
And to the rest of you, enjoy! I tried hard to give you all a story that you would all appreciate. (God help me!)  
  
The choices I gave you were very brief, and trust me, I have much more in store than just those little, simple plot lines. So thanks again for helping me to decide on what to do for the rest of the story.  
  
(And is Harry really that out of character? I didn't think so, but oh well. I'll try to straighten that out a little bit.)  
  
Chapter 6: A Hard Lesson to Learn  
  
It was the next day, and Harry wasn't ready for his Occulmency lessons again. He didn't want to be here with only Snape around, as if school wasn't bad enough. He had earlier been informed that lessons would begin at 1:00 pm, an hour after lunch. Just the thought of lunch made him hungry again. He hadn't eaten since he had come back to Grimmauld Place, especially with the thought of having to see Snape at every meal. Just the thought of that insensitive jerk made him lose his appetite all over again. Of course, the hungry feeling just came back again.  
  
Harry looked at the clock. It was nearly 12, time to eat if he was going to. He seriously considered not eating again, but his stomach was loudly protesting. It would be better to just face Snape and get it over with. He would have to see him again later, anyway.  
  
Harry made his way quietly down the stairs and into the pantry, retrieving the same jar of peanut butter and bread he had taken out yesterday. This time, he shouldn't be stopped. He made his sandwich quietly and sat down at the long table to eat. It wasn't long before Snape himself came and sat down as far away at the same table as earthly possible. He summoned himself a cup of coffee and sat drinking it while reading the Daily Prophet. Harry could have told him that there was absolutely nothing of interest in there, but why bother? It was amazing that, although now everyone knew of Voldemort's return, there was nothing in the paper that was really new news.  
  
Harry got up and left after he had finished with his food, heading for his room to spend another dull hour before his Occulmency lesson. "In less than an hour," Snape began, "I want you out in the library and ready to begin." Harry mentally screamed.  
  
He went to his room and looked around for something, anything, to do. He saw an old radio Dudley had thrown out. The only reason Dudley was tossing it was because he had received a newer, better one for losing 15 pounds over the school year. So, Harry had kept it. It worked fine, and sometimes when the Dursley's were gone, he would turn it on and listen.  
  
He turned it on to the first local station he could receive clearly. On it was a group called Linkin Park, singing a song he felt fit in pretty well with his life at the present:  
  
_Can't you see that you're smothering me  
  
Holding too tightly afraid to lose control  
  
Cause everything that you thought I would be  
  
Has fallen apart right in front of you  
  
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)  
  
Every step that I take is another mistake to you  
  
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)  
  
And every second I waste is more than I can take  
  
I've become so numb I can't feel you there  
  
I've become so tired so much more aware  
  
I'm becoming this all I want to do  
  
Is be more like me and be less like you_  
  
Like the singer, he felt alone, hurt, and like he didn't live up to the standards everyone else had set for him. How was he supposed to be the one to defeat Voldemort? The more he thought about it, the more ridiculous the idea became. He sat listening to the radio until near 1:00, then found his way to the downstairs library. Snape was already waiting for him when he arrived. "Do you have your wand?" Snape asked.  
  
"Right here," Harry answered, pulling the wand out of his pocket. As he stood there, he thought about all the memories he would rather Snape not see. He would have to work really hard to make sure those memories were never seen.  
  
"Get ready," came the command. Harry stood in a position most would recognize as the one used in wizard's duels. "_Legilimens_!"  
  
Memories flooded back. The department of mysteries came back into his mind. Sirius falling through the veil. Always the same mesmerizing visions. Cedric Diggory's parents meeting him in the hospital wing. Mustering a will from somewhere, Harry thought up a curse and used it on Snape, freeing his mind for the present.  
  
"Curses won't always work," Snape hissed. "You must learn to block your mind from me." Harry wasn't paying attention. He was too busy mentally congratulating himself for hexing Snape.  
  
"_Legilimens_!" More memories, this time of talking to Sirius through the fire, detention with Professor Umbridge. At the thought of Umbridge and her evil, conniving ways, his mind began to dwell on it. The words even now were still etched into the back of his hand, as if to serve as a constant reminder of her. Snape ended the curse. "What was that?" he asked.  
  
Harry picked himself off the carpeted floor. "What was what?" He asked through clenched teeth.  
  
"That memory with Umbridge in it."  
  
"Detention." 'Duh,' Harry thought.  
  
"_Legilimens!"_ The memories flooded into his head. Now he saw the time when he had fallen into Snape's Pensieve, and the memories he saw while there. He saw Hagrid giving him his school letter for him to read. He saw the graveyard, and Voldemort using the cruciatus curse on him. The memory was so vivid that he could almost feel the pain again. Snape released him from the spell. "You need more practice, Potter," he sneered to the figure lying on the floor in misery. Harry hated Snape in that moment more than he had in a long while.  
  
He realized in that moment that there were some memories that he never wanted anyone to see. He would rather die than let Snape see those memories, but at the rate he was going, Snape was going to see them eventually. He thought of only one way to ensure that that would never happen. He decided to run away.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, I may just end up changing that in the end. I just wanted to get this chapter out of my system. Tell me what you think. It's crappy, but I haven't had much time to work on it. I'll update ASAP.  
  
And I can't wait for the new Harry Potter film to come out!


	7. Chapter 7: The Decision to Flee

* * *

Disclaimer: These characters do not belong to me at all.  
  
A/n: Sorry it's taken so long. I am doing a lot of homework and preparations for exams lately. Thanks for all of the reviews. I'll try to update any chance I get, but I'll tell you to not get your hopes up.  
  
Warning: Ootp spoilers and Child Abuse  
  
Chapter 7: The Decision to Flee  
  
Harry sat in his room that night contemplating his daring plan. He felt like a convict, attempting to escape from prison. He worked the whole thing out in his mind:  
  
He would leave when Snape was called away to a Death eater meeting. He would have to be careful to keep his plans a secret, or else everything would be ruined. Snape just couldn't see some of those memories.  
  
There were no dreams that night, thankfully, just a horrible headache the next morning. Harry went to breakfast and fried his own eggs, not bothering to worry about Snape this morning. In fact, the horrid old bat didn't show his face throughout breakfast, which pleased Harry considerably. After eating, he made his way into his room and started on homework he had for the summer. 'I wonder when my O.W.L.S. will come back,' he thought glumly. The thought of making a Troll on his Potions grade plagued his mind constantly.  
  
At 1:00, he again went to have his Occlumency lesson. Snape was waiting for him, no pensieve in sight. "Practice, Potter?" Snape mocked.  
  
"Yes," Harry said, not daring to meet his Professor's eyes.  
  
"Get ready then," Snape said, getting his wand ready. "_Legilimens_!"  
  
Memories from Hogwarts came back into his mind like the rush of water from a destroyed dam. He saw the time he saw the dementors during the Quidditch match. Then the time when he fought off the dementors. Finally, a memory he thought worse than all of those combined surfaced. It was one in which his uncle had locked him in his room for no less than three days without food or water, or a bathroom break. It was after Dudley had broken one of Aunt Petunia's cherished lamps. He had suffered a severe lashing on the back from a belt, and then was quite literally banished into his room for what seemed forever. This memory was too much for him to handle. He stunned Snape with the first curse that came to mind. "_Stupefy_!"

* * *

Snape saw the curse just in time to dodge it. Harry expected to be yelled out or cursed for what he had done. Instead, Snape simply said, "You may leave." Harry took the opportunity and left before Snape could change his mind. Snape was in shock. Was Potter really treated so badly at home? Was there no one who cared for him? But Snape shrugged off the emotion. He did not care what Harry's life was like. He was there to teach Potter one thing, how to defend his mind against the Dark Lord. And that was all he was going to do. The boy's life with his family didn't matter to him.

Harry watched and waited in his room. Snape had yet to leave for a Death Eater meeting since he had made his decision. And since Snape had found a memory from the Dursleys', it was only a matter of time before he saw more of his life there. Harry wouldn't be able to withstand the ridicule and mockery if Snape really saw what life was like for him at home. He would be forced to remember all that had happened eventually if this kept on. Harry knew he wouldn't be able to master Occlumency, and that Snape would just continuously pry into his mind and find out secrets of his life that not even Ron and Hermione knew.  
  
Harry had a small bag hidden under his bed. It was filled with muggle clothing, a set of robes, and wizard money. It was all ready to go. He hadn't an idea of where he was to stay. He hadn't really thought of it. He would probably end up returning to the Dursley's, a place no one would ever expect to find him. Either that, or completely leave England. He didn't like that option much, but he didn't know what choice he had. Anyone who found him would take him back to Grimmauld Place. Back to his Occulmency lessons. He wouldn't be able to take it much longer.  
  
Harry was asleep when he heard the front door open and close. He looked out of his window and saw Snape walking down the driveway and disappearing. He didn't know how much time he would have, so he made the most of the time that he did have. Harry retrieved the bag from under his bed, and walked out the door, thinking he would not see the place for a long time. He had escaped for now, and no one would ever know the horrors he had been through.

* * *

_A/n: Please forgive how short this is. I know you've asked for longer chapter. I just haven't had much time for writing lately. Exams and school have really been taking a long time. It will be at least a week until I can update again. Sorry. Please R/r._


	8. Chapter 8:He's Gone!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything  
  
A/n: Back from vacation, am very, VERY tired, but decided to give you a little more of my story to chew on until I can further update. Enjoy  
  
Chapter 8: "He's Gone!"  
  
Snape walked up to the front porch of Grimmauld Place, returning after a two hour Death Eater meeting during which Lord Voldemort had been exceptionally mad that he had yet to find the whereabouts of Harry Potter or the Order of the Phoenix.. As he stepped onto the porch, he noticed that the door was slightly cracked open. Thinking of how he always took care to make sure that the door was securely shut, he pushed the door open and ran inside. There was no sign that anyone had been in the house besides himself and Potter.  
  
Snape ran upstairs and looked into the first room he came to, Potter's room. The door was closed, just as it had been when he had left earlier. Upon opening it, thought, he found that it was completely empty. There were signs that Potter had been in there earlier, that he had been sleeping, and that he had left not too long ago. Snape decided to do a thorough search to make sure that the boy had simply not wandered into another room of the large house.  
  
Thoroughly he searched the entire place. He found no trace of Potter left in the place, he had simply disappeared. As there was no sign of a struggle, and since no enemies knew where the Headquarters were, Snape concluded that the boy had foolishly run away. Snape knew that he couldn't contact the rest of the order, so he decided to begin the search on his own, and find out where the stupid boy had gone.

* * *

Harry, meanwhile, had waved down the Knight Bus. He cleverly used a concealment charm so that he would be unrecognizable. He took the bus to a street not to far from Privet Drive. It was around 11 o'clock, a time when Uncle Vernon would be watching the late night news, Aunt Petunia would be reading a magazine, and Dudley would either be with a friend of playing a video game. Mustering up courage, he knocked on the door. It was opened quickly by Uncle Vernon.  
  
"What are you doing here, boy?" he asked.  
  
"My training was done and I was told to come back here."  
  
"And why should I let you into this house again? We just barely got rid of you."  
  
"Because you agreed to take me in, and my friends wouldn't be too pleased to see that you won't even let me back into this house."  
  
Uncle Vernon turned a crimson red, then stepped aside and let Harry through. Harry stepped in and the door was closed behind him. His back was turned to his uncle, so he did not see what was about o happen. As he stood past the doorway, he was knocked over by his uncle. Losing his balance completely, Harry fell into the table nearby and hit his side on the corner.  
  
"Ungrateful little brat," Vernon spat. He kicked Harry in the ribs, then grabbed him by the shirt collar. Harry was literally dragged into his room.  
  
"I don't want to hear a single word," the hiss came from the door. The door was closed and several locks were snapped into place. Harry sat in disbelief for a long time, not believing that he would rather be here than taking Occlumency lessons. Moaning over his sore ribs and ill fortune, Harry lay on his bed and tried to go to sleep, although he was unable to ignore the hurt of every breath that he took.

* * *

Snape thought carefully of where to look for the boy. He gave him slight credit in thinking that he would never go to a very public place such as the Leaky Cauldron. He wouldn't leave England, he was sure. It was too much of a hassle to get away from the country without being seen by the WBP (Wizarding Border Patrol) (A/n: lol, how creative was that?) Snape decided to start with a simple plan, go to the Dursleys' and see if for some strange reason he had turned up there. It was a start.  
  
He left quickly, and walked to the end of the street. Snape waved down the Knight Bus. Climbing aboard, he asked, "Have either of you seen a boy of about 16, named Harry Potter."  
  
One of the conductors looked at him in disbelief. "Blimey, no. We would have recognized 'Arry Potter, wouldn't we, Stan?" Stan nodded. "But a boy about 16 entered the bus over an hour ago. Went to a place called Surrey."  
  
"Take me there," Snape commanded, then sat down in the back after paying his fare.

* * *

_Give me a break, I'm tired. Sorry its short. R/r please_


	9. Chapter 9: In a State of Disbelief

Disclaimer: None of the characters belong to me.  
  
A/n: Well, I figured it was about time to update again. So here goes. By the way, did you all see the new HP movie? I liked it, but they missed so much in the movie!! Wish it had more detail. Well, here goes the next chapter.  
  
Chapter 9: In a State of Disbelief  
  
Harry lay on the floor next to his bed. He couldn't muster the strength nor the willpower to stand and make his way onto the bed. It would be too much effort. Uncle Vernon had just left from a rundown of the "Rules". Of course that hadn't been all that had occurred. Harry had decided to get smart and talk back to his uncle, and that did not end well at all. Vernon took it upon himself to severely punish the boy. A relentless pounding followed, in which his uncle hit him in the ribs and chest until something cracked. Uncle Vernon was always careful to not hit in the face, where abuse would be evident.  
  
Now Harry was alone in his dark room, hurt and unable to move, with breathing a labor in itself. From the street below he heard the sound of someone grumbling and walking toward his house. A loud knock followed shortly. Harry heard the sounds of his uncle opening the door and talking to someone. Harry strained his ears to hear.  
  
"I was wondering if your nephew, Harry Potter, arrived recently." Harry recognized the cold, smooth voice of Professor Snape.  
  
"No, I'm afraid I haven't seen him," Vernon answered with a sound of impatience and distaste.  
  
"Are you absolutely sure?"  
  
"Positive. Now if you don't mind, it is late and we don't enjoy having any freaks in our home."  
  
"Freaks?" Snape snapped. "If anyone is a freak, it would be you and that whale of a son I've seen before."  
  
"You've been watching our house?!"  
  
"Don't flatter yourself; I was keeping an eye on your nephew." Harry hadn't known that Snape was one of the guard, although it would have made some sense.  
  
"Get out of my house!" Vernon yelled. "Or I might have a mind to call the police."  
  
"You won't call them. What would you say? There's a wizard in my house? I highly doubt they would believe you." Snape's voice was becoming lower and more dangerous by the minute. "Well, I told you what you asked to know. Now leave."  
  
"Dursley, if you knew half of the things I could do to you, you wouldn't dare talk to me like that." Snape had the same menacing voice that made most students want to crawl into a hole and hide.  
  
"You wouldn't dare," Vernon said, obviously scared to death.  
  
Harry didn't hear what curse was muttered. He only heard a heavy drop onto the floor down below and his aunt screaming soon after. In a moment her screams were silenced. The sound of footsteps going up the creaky stairs followed. Harry panicked. He couldn't let anyone see him like this. Thinking of the only logical move in that situation, he struggled to make it under the bed.  
  
"Alohamora." Harry listened as all of the locks on his room door were unlocked. The door swung slowly open and footsteps made their way slowly into the room. The effort of his quick movements finally caught up with Harry, and his head began to swim with pain. He struggled to keep his breathing quiet. "Lumos," Snape said. A light shone brightly in the small, dark room. Harry had so completely hidden himself that no light from the man's wand fell onto him. Snape began doing a careful search, searching for Harry and any sign that he had recently been there. Drawers and closet doors were opened, only to be closed again in growing frustration.  
  
Snape was about to give up and leave, when his wand light landed on something red and wet on the floor. It was only a small drop, but there it was. Blood. It was slightly smeared as though someone had been drug. From the direction the blood was smeared, the person was underneath the bed. Snape, not in the mood to bend down and look to see under the bed, simply levitated the bed out of the way. Underneath, there lay a very still, very pale, and very tired looking Potter.  
  
Harry was waiting for Snape to go away when the bed was levitated from over him. The last thing he saw before he passed out was a look of shock and disgust on his professor's face. Snape bent down and grabbed Harry by the arm and appearated back to Number 12, Grimmauld Place. "Morbilicorpus," Snape muttered, lifting the broken boy's body with magic and going to his room. Gently, Harry was laid onto his bed. Snape didn't really want anything to do with the boy. He was a bit shocked to find out that Potter was being beaten in his own home so severely. Normally, Snape wouldn't have interfered, but since the boy was unconscious and obviously in serious pain, he would help him out a bit.  
  
To better see what damage had been done, Snape took off Harry's shirt and looked to see a rib that poked out too far. There were new bruises on the boy's chest and back, and a good sized cut on his shoulder. Snape used his wand to heal the injuries as best as he could for the time being. Afterwards, he put Harry in a full body bind, locked the door, and went to sleep in his own room. Sleep didn't come easy for Professor Snape, and for a while he lay awake in disbelief about how the Golden Boy was treated at home.

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So it needs work. R/r please. 


	10. Chapter 10: Reckless Youth and Interroga...

Disclaimer: Don't own a thing.  
  
Well, this is a rush chapter, but please r/r. Thanks to all the reviewers so far. You all have really kept me going! Hope you enjoy this chapter, even if it is going to be a bit short.  
  
Chapter 10: Reckless Youth and Interrogations  
  
Harry awoke early the next morning. He tried to move his arms to rub his eyes that wouldn't seem to stay open, when he realized that his arms wouldn't move. He tried again, and got the same results. He tried to move any part of his body, but found that he was completely immobile. He looked around the room, and couldn't remember where he was. It took a moment to remember the events from the previous night, and conclude that Snape had brought him back here. Now, to keep him from running off, he was in a full body bind, and he couldn't escape again.  
  
Harry tried to shout, but found that his ribs were too painful to attempt the deep breath needed to accomplish that. He was forced to stay still for at least a good thirty minutes before his door was unlocked and Snape came sweeping into the room, cape billowing dramatically behind him. "Let me go," Harry sneered.  
  
"I do not take orders from an insufferable, selfish brat like you," Snape responded in a dangerous voice. "Do you even realize how much has been done to keep you from harm, and then you intentionally place yourself in a situation that endangers you? I would care less, but I am under strict orders from Dumbledore to look after you until his return."  
  
"Well, lucky for you, that shouldn't be too much longer."  
  
"I received a message yesterday evening that said his return would be postponed for a while longer."  
  
"Oh..." Harry said quietly.  
  
"Now, tell me why you ran away in the first place." Snape's voice was very commanding and allowed no reason for insubordination. Yet Harry dared to defy him.  
  
"I don't have to," he answered with as much confidence as he could muster.  
  
"Tell me or I can let you suffer in pain."  
  
"I can deal with it myself. I've never needed your help before."  
  
"I have ways of making you talk, boy," Snape sneered, bringing his face very close to Harry's.  
  
"Go ahead. I'll not tell you." Snape, without another word, swept out of the room in the blink of an eye, and just as quickly returned with a small phial of clear liquid that Harry recognized immediately as veritaserum.  
  
"Don't make me waste any of this on you." Harry didn't respond. Snape whipped out his wand and muttered "Rictus". Harry's jaw was forced open, giving Professor Snape the opportunity to pour three drops of the truth serum into his mouth. With his mouth simply hanging open, the serum slid down his throat. Snape muttered the countercurse, and Harry's mouth closed again.  
  
"Now, you have no choice but to answer me. What's your full name?"  
  
Harry answered mechanically, "Harold James Potter."  
  
Satisfied that the potion worked, Snape began his interrogation. "Why did you leave?"  
  
Harry tried in vain to stop the flow of words from his mouth. 'It's just a matter of willpower,' he thought. But it didn't turn out to be that way. The longer he kept his mouth shut, the more nausea he began to feel.  
  
"You might as well go ahead and answer. It will eventually come out anyway."  
  
"I...couldn't...let...you...see," he said, although struggling to keep it in.  
  
"See what?" Snape pressed, becoming interested, although not showing it to the boy.  
  
"Show you, what it was like back there. You...you would have seen eventually. I...didn't want to be weak. I can't be weak. I'm...supposed to save everyone. How can people trust me to do that if I can't stop my own uncle from hitting me?"  
  
Snape didn't answer. "Why did you go back there? Why not go somewhere else?"  
  
"I didn't think you would find me there. It seemed like a good idea at the time."  
  
Snape decided to use the opportunity to prod deeper into Harry's personal life. "Who have you told about what you saw in the pensieve?"  
  
"I asked Sirius and Lupin about it, but that is all. No one else knows."  
  
"What? Don't you want to talk about how your professor was humiliated when he was in school?" Snape's temper was flaring.  
  
"No..." Harry really didn't want the next part to come out. "I actually felt pity for you. Of course, than I remember that you're a heartless, overgrown bat and that you don't have emotions, and the pity is gone." Harry was beginning to use the veritaserum to his advantage. Snape said nothing else. He was too angry. For a moment, he raised his want and looked as though he might curse Harry into oblivion. Giving the glare that would cause anyone to wet themselves, he turned and left the room, slamming the door and locking it behind him. Harry lay back in bed and eventually fell back asleep, if for no other reason to escape the pain.  
  
Rictus = the open mouth in Latin  
  
Short, but I hope you enjoyed. Please R/r. 


	11. Chapter 11: A Time to Heal

Disclaimer: I don't own any of it.  
  
A/n: I thank you all for your review. Please keep them up. They really do keep me writing. Here goes another chapter because I was bored (even if I do have other things that need to get done.)  
  
And does anyone know any good websites for finding Latin translations? It would be a big help if you could tell me it. And if you could bear with me, I never know how long chapters should be.  
  
**Chapter 11: A Time to Heal**  
  
Harry was awakened by the sound of someone opening his door. It was late in the afternoon, nearly dusk by how it looked outside. Snape came into his room and closed the curtains that had allowed in so much light until then. Harry would have moved to sit up, but of course he still couldn't. Snape turned back to face Harry.  
  
"The veritaserum should have worn off by now. I don't want to hear a single remark about earlier. Do you understand me?"  
  
"Perfectly," Harry answered. He was glad to know that he had gotten on Snape's nerves earlier, although he couldn't show it.  
  
Snape took phials of potions out of his robes and set them on the table beside Harry's bed. The first one he handed to Harry as though expecting him to take them. "Umm, I can't exactly move," Harry said sarcastically.  
  
Snape muttered the countercurse and handed Harry the potion again. "What are these?" Harry asked.  
  
"Shut up and don't ask stupid questions. Just drink them."  
  
"I think I deserve to know if you're about to poison me," Harry sneered. But he drank each of the potions, one at a time, as they were handed to him. Slowly, he could feel his body beginning to heal itself, and in a matter of minutes, nearly all his cuts and bruises were gone. "Why are my ribs still broken?"  
  
"Because I don't think you can handle another potion right now. Maybe later. Until then, you are to sit here and think about the consequences of your actions."  
  
"Consequences of my actions? I'm not a child anymore. I don't have to sit in my room and think about what I've just done. And who are you to boss me around, anyway?"  
  
"For now, the guardian that the Headmaster left in charge until his return."  
  
"Yeah? Well, I'm not going to listen to you? Besides, what can you possibly do to me? If you do anything, Professor Dumbledore will find out, and then you'll be in deep trouble. So go ahead. Threaten me. But the fact is that you're all talk and no action."  
  
"Do you want to bet that I can't do anything about your insolence?" Snape sneered, his voice lowered to a dangerous level. He aimed his wand at Harry. "_Acclaro Dirus_" Snape sneered.  
  
Before Harry's eyes flashed every fear he had ever had. First and foremost was the fear of Vernon Dursley, who he had learned to be afraid of when he was a very young child. Then came the dementors, who relentlessly seemed to pursue sucking out his happiness. Finally, he saw Voldemort, the person who continuously killed people he cared about. Snape ended the spell with that. "Don't you fear anything normal?" he asked.  
  
"And just what is your idea of normal?" Harry asked.  
  
"Normal as in spiders, snakes, or something like that."  
  
"Nope. I am scared of abnormally large noses, like yours."  
  
Snape sneered at the comment. "I'll teach you fear boy," Snape threatened. "_Discrucio_." He muttered, again aiming his wand at Harry. What Harry saw was enough to scare a grown man into a cowering infant. He saw muggles and wizards being tortured by the dark lord. He saw the pain of their families as they watched their loved ones slowly dying in pain and misery, and knowing that they would be next. He saw children experiencing the same fate as their parents. The spell was released, and Harry realized that a tear was trickling down his cheek.  
  
"Why?" Harry asked. "Why did you do that?"  
  
"Because you have to realize what can and will happen if you don't master occlumency, or if you run off selfishly again. The dark lord tortures people like that everyday. If you accidentally allow the dark lord to see through your eyes, the same could happen to the Order and any of your little friends."  
  
Snape left with that comment. Harry couldn't get the people's faces off his mind. He couldn't forget what he had seen. And with that, he decided that he would master occlumency. That he couldn't let people he loved be tortured like that. And that he would one day stop Voldemort form harming anyone else.

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Short, sorry. But I needed a chapter to get me to the next phase of my story. Please R/r. 


	12. Chapter 12: Learning One Day at a Time

Disclaimer: I own nothing  
  
I know that this story is going kind of slow, but bear with me. Thanks to my reviewers again. I appreciate reviews as it helps me to know how I'm doing and how I should improve. I had writer's block on this story, so while I did, I wrote a short Song-fic. Please read it and tell me what you think. It's called "I Believe."  
  
Chapter 12: Learning One Day at a Time  
  
Harry was still sitting in his room the next morning, only having moved once since the previous night to go to the bathroom. He was hungry, but he chose to ignore the pain. He couldn't bring himself to move around much. Not only was he in physical pain, but he felt deep remorse for having run away, and for being a coward when it came to learning occlumency. He sat there until a knock came from the door of his room. He didn't have to give permission before the towering figure of Professor Snape entered. He was caring a tray of food with him, and a phial of some potions that he couldn't identify.  
  
"You need to take this potion, and then eat something with it. You're too skinny," Professor Snape said. Harry did as he was told without arguing back. "Occlumency begins today at 1:00, so be ready." The Professor turned to leave, but suddenly turned around when he remembered something. "You're OWL results came back. I'll give them to you after you've eaten." And then he was gone.  
  
Harry ate in a hurry, not giving his stomach time to get used to the food. He gulped down the potion and ran downstairs to get the results of his tests. "That was quick," Snape said simply, handing over the envelope.  
  
Harry nodded and opened the letter, his heart pounding profusely as he looked over his results. He nearly fainted with relief when he saw his scores. He had passes Potions with an O. How that had happened, he had no idea, but he did. Transfiguration had been an E, and O in Defense Against the Dark arts. He had, in fact, passed all of his Owls with a remarkable grade, except for Divination, in which he had earned a T.  
  
Harry felt an enormous amount of relief. As the relief hit, though, so did an uncontrollable wave of dizziness. He closed his eyes to try to make it go away, but to no avail. Harry collapsed onto the floor, oblivious to the world around him.

* * *

An hour later, Harry awoke in his room, with Snape hovering over him. It wasn't a pleasant experience, waking up and seeing Snape's long nose right away. "Too much excitement for poor Potter," Snape mocked. "And not to mention that you ate too fast."  
  
"Oops," Harry said, not really meaning it. His head was hurting, and he was in no mood to do any type of socializing.  
  
"Drink this," Snape commanded.  
  
"Another one?" Harry asked in disbelief, but he took it anyway. His head began to clear and his head stopped aching.  
  
"Occlumency at 1," Snape reminded, leaving the room. Harry wasn't surprised at the reminder in the least bit. At precisely 1 o'clock, Harry arrived in the Study, not really ready for Occlumency, but still feeling obligated to learn now.  
  
"Are you ready?" Snape asked.  
  
'Am I ever?' Harry wished to say. "Yes sir."  
  
"Legilimens!" (A/n: how do you spell it?) Harry felt the rush of memories flood his mind. The first one was of Dudley's gang cornering him at the park when he was 10 years old. They had tied him to an oak tree and thrown mud at him, causing the rest of the children in the park to laugh also. The next memory is one in which he had nearly died in the Chamber of Secrets, after the Basilisk had bit him with his fang, with Tom Riddle standing above him and telling him he had little more than a minute to live. The memory faded, as one in which Uncle Vernon was cornering him took over. His uncle had a belt ready, and a malice in his eyes that craved bloodshed. 'No!' Harry thought. 'No one can ever see that.' With all of the determination that he had left, he tried to push the memory away. He tried to push Snape out of his mind with all of his might. He remembered the importance of his learning Occlumency, and how bad it could be if he didn't. As he fought to regain control of his memories, they began to fade, and the room in which he was standing became more visible. He could see Snape standing before him, and gave one last push of the mind before forcing Snape out. Snape gave him a look of surprise as Harry fell onto his knees in exhaustion.  
  
It was the first time Harry had ever succeeded in clearing his mind. He was still recovering when Snape hit him again without warning. Memories of the graveyard returned, and Harry began to feel fear at the sight of it. He couldn't push Snape out this time, it was as if his mind had shut itself down. Snape released the spell.  
  
"That was better," Snape admitted. "But you need to always be prepared."  
  
"I wasn't ready!" Harry argued, standing up from the floor. "That was unfair!"  
  
"The Dark Lord isn't fair. He won't give you any chances to recover, so you must almost be prepared. Clear your mind tonight before bed, and we will practice again tomorrow." With that, Snape turned and left the room. Harry couldn't help but feel angry that Snape had caught him off guard. But he felt proud that he had been able to free his mind this time.

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A/n: Sorry it's short, but I've been busy. Please R/r. 


	13. Chapter 13: A Revelation of Memories

Disclaimer: I own nothing! It all belongs to J.K. Rowling.  
  
Okay, so I got a little help from all of you, and I think you all had something going there. So, I'm going to try and give you all a story that you will love! Have fun, don't expect it to be too long, and review when you're through. I love writing for you guys (and girls).  
  
And don't worry Emma, I'm not ending it yet. I've still got a ways to go.  
  
Chapter 13: A Revelation of Memories  
  
Harry sat in his room, reminiscing on how unfair it was that Snape had caught him off-guard like that. Harry was a vengeance mood, too overwhelmed by his own hatred of his professor to really concentrate on clearing his mind, or to enjoy the fact that he had even cleared his mind the first time around, or that Snape had practically complimented him. Instead, his anger swelled up inside.  
  
Harry didn't go down to dinner. He really didn't feel like eating. He was used to going long periods without eating; it had just become second-nature to him. When he was sure that Snape was downstairs in the kitchen, Harry walked down the hallway to Sirius's old room. It was still full of the things that had been in there when it was occupied by his godfather. It even still smelled like him. Harry prowled around the room, not touching anything, just looking around. He saw pictures on tables and bureaus, pictures of Harry, Lily, James, Remus, and a few people who he didn't recognize. Harry smiled when he saw a picture of him and Sirius at the party before the start of his 5th year at Hogwarts.  
  
Looking next to that picture, Harry spotted a very familiar looking mirror. It was the one identical to the one that Sirius had given him before beginning Occlumency. 'I need you now,' he thought bleakly. 'I need to talk to you, but you're not here to listen anymore.' The young boy in him wanted no more than to cry, but the man that he was becoming demanded him to not give in to the foolish wish for tears.  
  
Harry didn't wish to look any farther in the room. There were too many memories in there that he didn't want to relive. He silently left the room, making his way to the room where Buckbeak was kept. He entered the room to find a very lonely hippogriff, seeming to wait for company. Harry bowed low, and Buckbeak returned the gesture, allowing Harry to step closer and pet him on the head. Harry noticed that the animal was not lacking in food. Since Harry had, until just recently, forgotten about the poor animal, he assumed that Snape was the one who had been feeding the animal.  
  
He sat in there for hours, enjoying the company of another soul that didn't criticize him every change it got, and Buckbeak seemed to enjoy the company also. He didn't even realize that he had fallen asleep until he began to dream. His dream was of everyone he had lost. His parents were there, along with Cedric and Sirius. He called out for them, and they only stared back in response. His mother stared at him with sadness etched into her face. When he called out again, they all turned and walked away, and no matter what he tried, he couldn't follow after them.  
  
Harry awoke distressed, and wishing that he could have spoken with them for only a minute, just to tell them how sorry he was that it had been them instead of him. He looked around at his surroundings suspiciously, and realized that this was not the place where he had fallen asleep. He was back in his room, lying on his warm, comfortable bed, and not sharing quarters with Buckbeak. He didn't know how, but he had obviously been moved as he slept. He didn't know how he didn't notice being moved to another room, he was such a light sleeper because of having to live with the Dursleys and having to respond immediately to their every beck and call.  
  
It was five o'clock in the morning, but Harry wasn't tired enough to go back to sleep. So, instead, he made his way down to the Study, which was shadowed in darkness until morning light would touch it. The room seemed quiet enough, and he was sure that he was alone for the time being. He sat down on a chair near the corner of the room, and realized for the first time how quiet it had been since his arrival. Someone must have finally been able to move Mrs. Black's portrait from the wall.  
  
Harry was debating on what he should do with the time until breakfast. He fingered the wand in his pocket, until a voice came from the opposite corner of the room that said, in a slow drawl, "Why are you up so early?"  
  
"I wasn't tired," Harry answered, annoyed that Snape had not made his presence known until then. "What about you? Why are you up now?"  
  
"Not that it is any of your business, but I always wake up at this time."  
  
Harry decided to avoid any more conversations if possible. He leaned back on the couch and closed his eyes, deciding to ignore his Professor if at all possible. Unfortunately, Snape wasn't going to let him. "Why didn't you come down to dinner?" he asked, and Harry could almost hear the sneer and sarcasm on his face.  
  
"I wasn't hungry." And that was the honest truth.  
  
"In occlumency, the body as well as the mind work together. Your mind cannot be up to its full potential if your body is weak. You need to eat."  
  
"I'll eat breakfast," Harry said quietly, although annoyance was evident in his tone of voice.  
  
"I am as of now requiring you to eat at least three meals a day."  
  
"You can't do that!" Harry snapped. "I don't have to eat if I'm not hungry. It's not your problem to make sure I eat as you see fit, so just leave me alone about it."  
  
"You are wrong about that. As long as you are here under my supervision, you are to do exactly as told."  
  
"I'm deciding when I eat, and you can't make me if I don't want to."  
  
"Since you are up so early, I suggest you eat breakfast now, and you can get an early start on your Occlumency."  
  
"I'm not going to eat."  
  
Snape remained quiet for a moment. Than, to Harry's great surprise, he said, "Fine. If that's the way you want it."  
  
Harry cocked an eyebrow, but said nothing in response. Instead, he asked, "When should I begin?"  
  
"No time like the present," Snape commented. "You do have your wand, don't you?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Yes what?"  
  
"Yes sir." Harry pulled the wand out of his pocket, and turned to the corner where he knew Snape was.  
  
"Incendo," Snape muttered, lighting candles that were along the walls of the room. Suddenly, the room was bright again, and Harry could see everything clearly. Except, that is, for Snape's face, which still remained in shadows.  
  
"Ready?" Snape asked, although he did not wait for a response before casting the spell. Harry flashed to the sorting hat, telling him that he would do well in Slytherin. He flashed to the trial in which he had been so afraid of being kicked out of Hogwarts for good. He focused, and tried to clear the image from his mind. It worked in the sense that the image disappeared, but another image took its place just as quickly. This scene was of him being attacked on a street corner when he was 10, and having no where to run or anyone to go to for help. He had been hurt badly, not as though his aunt and uncle cared at all. Harry concentrated on getting rid of the scene harder, and eventually, it faded. He saw Snape standing in front of him, still holding the spell. Harry took all of his energy and yelled "Protego," forgetting that he had been told to not use that spell.  
  
For the second time in his life, memories flooded his mind that were not his own. A young boy being yelled at by a much larger man, a young Severus Snape, standing at an alter, watching a woman in white walking down the aisle toward him. He saw the woman in another scene, cradled in the man's arms, as blood dripped down onto the ground below. At that moment, Harry was pushed out of Snape's mind, and the brunt force of it knocked him down onto the floor. From his position on the floor, Harry looked up at his Professor. The man was livid with rage. Any color that had been there was gone from his face, and he was white as a sheet. Harry could sense the white-hot anger pouring out, and knew that it was directed toward him.  
  
"I thought I told you to never use that spell again," Snape sneered in a deadly voice that was barely audible and yet frightening.  
  
"I forgot," Harry muttered lamely.  
  
"Forgot? How convenient for you."  
  
"I didn't mean to see anything. It was the first spell that came to mind, honestly." Harry picked himself off the floor, and clutched his wand desperately, trying to prepare for what Snape might do to him.  
  
"Get out of here," Snape whispered. Harry didn't move an inch. "I said GO!" With that, Harry ran up the stairs, if for no other reason than for utter fear for his life.  
  
He closed the door to his room and locked it tightly. He was out of breath, from the shock of what he had seen, the fear of Snape cursing him into oblivion, and just running up the stairs so quickly. Harry couldn't believe that that had been Snape's wedding day. Snape couldn't have ever gotten married. Who could ever love that greasy git?  
  
For a long time, he sat in his room, afraid to leave should Snape decide to come out and curse him. Eventually, hunger won at almost eleven o'clock, and Harry decided to go get something to eat. It had been a while since he had eaten, and Snape wouldn't eat until an hour later.  
  
He checked behind every corner to make sure he was alone as he made his way down to the kitchen. All was silent, and Snape was nowhere in sight. He cautiously made his way to the pantry, and got out what resembled Muggle cold-cuts. He was about to turn around and leave, when a cold voice behind him said, "What are you doing here?"  
  
For some reason, the shock of being caught overwhelmed Harry's exhausted body. Finding peace in the coming darkness, he fainted onto the cold, hard floor below him, and knew no more.

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_A/n: Well, folks, Tell me what you think please. I'll update as soon as I can. Have fun!_


	14. Chapter 14: Revelations

Disclaimer: I own nothing.  
  
A/n: Hey people. Thank you for the positive reviews! I am going to try to update every chance I have.  
  
Here's another chapter for you all.  
  
Chapter 14: Revelations  
  
Snape sneered down at the boy who lay unconscious on the floor. He wanted nothing more than to leave the boy there. But, for some reason, he couldn't let him stay there until it suited him to wake back up. Gently, he lifted him up and carried him into the room where Harry was staying. He lay him down on the bed and pondered as to what had caused the boy to collapse. It was probably from lack of any food. Seeing nothing that he could do until Potter awoke, he left.  
  
Snape made his way back to the kitchen and sat down at the table. He was mentally exhausted. He laid his face in his hands, and reflected over what the Potter boy had seen. Few people had ever known about Isabella. Dumbledore was the only person he had ever really spoken to about it. He felt as though he had really just seen her dying again, her blood on his hands as he held her there. If he hadn't of been so angry, he would have been near tears. He was not only mad at Potter for breaking into his mind, but at himself for not removing the memories into a Pensieve.  
  
He sat there for a long time, his mind going over his times with Isabella. His thoughts were disrupted from a loud thud upstairs. He quickly made his way up to Potter's room, and opened the door. Potter was standing up near his bed, and had knocked a large book of his bedside table. He looked at Snape, then quickly averted his eyes. "Come down and eat if you feel like it," Snape invited, then turned and left.  
  
Harry sat down back on his bed and thought it was better to just stay there for a little while and let the world stop spinning. Feeling that Snape's comment had been more of a command, he soon got up and went downstairs to where Snape was sitting at the table. Snape gave a wave of the wand, and a steaming plate of food appeared at the opposite end of the table. He motioned for Harry to sit there and eat without saying a single word.  
  
Harry only poked around his plate at first, until he saw the glare that Snape was giving him and then slowly began eating. As he ate, Snape began to talk. "Do you know what you saw?"  
  
"No sir," Harry said. "I got a basic idea though."  
  
"You are to tell no one. Understood?"  
  
"Yes sir. But, what exactly did I see?"  
  
"It is none of your bloody business!" Snape snarled.  
  
"I said I would tell no one. I mean it. You see my memories and question me all the time. Why not tell me?"  
  
"Because it is not your place know!"  
  
"Then I'm not going to eat!" Harry said suddenly, and dropped his fork.  
  
"Yes you will. And what does it matter to me?"  
  
"Until Professor Dumbledore gets back, you have to be my guardian. Meaning, if something goes wrong, it's your fault. So, tell me and I'll be a good little boy and eat."  
  
Snape gritted his teeth and gave Harry a death-glare. Harry glared right back, the same old defiance in his eyes.  
  
"I won't say a word to anyone. Promise. And besides, you do want me to eat, don't you?"  
  
Snape looked at Harry, a dangerous look in his eyes. He said, very slowly, "I could make you eat anyway. It's not hard." He adjusted himself in his chair. "What exactly do you want to know?"  
  
Harry couldn't believe what he just heard. "Who was she? What happened to her?"  
  
"She was named Isabella, and she was my wife. We were married for almost a year when the Dark Lord killed her. She was one of the few people who had ever cared for me and showed me love, and she was killed. So, to get revenge, I joined Dumbledore, and became a spy for him."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"Is that all?"  
  
"Why haven't you let anyone know about her or what happened?"  
  
"It would ruin my image now, wouldn't it?" Snape asked with a cold glare in his eyes. "Besides, in order to make the Dark Lord really think I was on his side, I had to act like I believed in what he was doing, and that my wife was in the way of his plan. I didn't really think he was gone anyway, but it would have been too hard to mention what had happened to anyone at first, and now no one would care to know that anyway."  
  
"They would find it interesting, though."  
  
Snape sneered again, although this time it was almost half-hearted. "More than likely."  
  
"So the whole reason you became a spy was because of her?"  
  
"Yes. She was avidly against the Dark Lord, and he knew it. So he personally decided to take care of her. He went to our home late one afternoon, while I was out, and killed her. I returned home, and she was still alive, but barely. I held her in my arms as she died. After that, I went to Dumbledore, and told him that I would become I spy. In order to do that, I had to convince the Dark Lord that I believed differently from how my wife had. He bought it. It wasn't easy, but eventually, he welcomed me into his ranks. And so, I became a spy."  
  
Harry began to put the food from his plate into his mouth, and ate, keeping his part of the deal. Snape left the room and went upstairs. He didn't cry upon reaching his bedroom, but instead, closed himself in his own mental reverie.

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A/n: So, what do you think? If you want to read a very dramatic song-fic about Isabella, read my story "I Believe." Please R/r. 


	15. Chapter 15: Apologies

Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me, at all. It all belongs to the great J.K. Rowling.  
  
A/n: You all are such great reviewers that I just can't stop writing. And if you want Harry blasted into oblivion, like The-Bass-player312, I will write a story just for you all after I finish this one! ( Until then, I am going to try to update as soon as I can, and write longer chapters. Thanks for reviewing you all, I really appreciate it.  
  
This chapter, so sorry, will be kind of short. Promise to make the next one longer though.  
  
Chapter 15: Apologies  
  
The next time they saw each other was dinner. It was an awkward affair, in which neither of them would speak to the other. In fact, Harry didn't even want to look at his professor. He couldn't look up without thinking of his professor, who he had absolutely thought was a heartless, overgrown bat, had once shown somebody love. It was mind-boggling. And Snape didn't look at Harry, either. He couldn't believe what he had told Potter either. He had never told anyone, so why would he tell the son of his worst enemy? It was as if someone had put veritaserum in something he had drunken earlier.  
  
Harry sighed on the opposite end of the table, annoyed and uncomfortable by the silence that was hanging over the table like a plague. Snape looked over to the boy at the sound of the loud sigh, and then looked back down at his plate when he saw that it had been nothing.  
  
"So, when do I practice occlumency again?" Harry asked suddenly and uncertainly.  
  
"In a couple of days, when you are stronger. Occlumency includes a balance between your physical well-being as well as your mental strength. Occlumency will not work if you have no strength for it."  
  
"Okay." Harry set down his fork and sighed again, looking out of the dining room window. He felt that he had to say something on his part. It had been he who had made Snape relive some of his worst memories, after all. "I'm sorry," he said in a surprisingly clear voice.  
  
Snape was startled by the statement, but did not allow the emotion to show on his face. The statement was a shock to he who thought that the son of James Potter would grow up being the exact replica of his father. "What are you sorry for, Mr. Potter?" Snape growled.  
  
"Sorry that I intruded into your mind. Sorry that I asked you about your wife and practically made you tell me what had happened."  
  
Snape didn't answer to the comment. Instead, he dropped his fork onto his plate and looked straight into the eyes of the first person to honestly apologize to him in a very long time. "You are forgiven," he said simply.  
  
"That's it? No scolding? No talks of how it had better not happen again?"  
  
"No. Not this time."  
  
Now it was Harry's turn to act stunned. "But, why? Aren't you angry at me? Don't you hate me for making you tells me that?"  
  
"No. If I hadn't of wanted to tell you, I wouldn't have." The truth was, even he didn't know why he had said anything in the first place.  
  
"Well, while I'm at it, I want to apologize for my father's behavior."  
  
"What?" This time the shock was displayed clearly on Snape's sallow face.  
  
"I'm apologizing for the way you were treated in school. They had no reason to be jerks to you. I know how it feels to be the outcast, and to be picked on by others. You should know that, after all of my memories that you have seen."  
  
"True. But why apologize for your father's actions?"  
  
"Because he's not here to apologize himself and neither is Sirius. So, I'm doing it for them. I think my mom would have wanted it."  
  
Snape paused and carefully weighed his words before speaking again. "Your father did apologize, once. Right before he gave me a butterbeer that caused me to turn invisible for thirty minutes."  
  
"Well, I'm being sincere."  
  
"Thank you," Snape said, before standing and sweeping out of the room. He couldn't believe what had just happened. He had shared a completely civil conversation with Potter, and had been apologized to by someone he thought was as arrogant as his father had been. With this, he might just have to change his opinion on the boy all together. But he would wait and see, first. See how sincere the boy really was. But deep in his heart that had become like stone, he knew that the apologies had been from the soul, and that the boy had apologized out of an utmost sincerity that few people seemed to have.  
  
Potter sat in the Study later at the same time he was there. He was doing homework, and it was more comfortable in there than in his room. He had been concentrating on remembering what spell could turn a frog into a tadpole and back again, when Snape spoke. "I would like to apologize also," he began. "For the way I acted toward you in class for the past five years. Of course, don't think it's going to change any."  
  
"And why not?" "Because, if you recall, there are several Death Eaters' children in my class. If I started to act nicer to you, don't you think that would look suspicious?"  
  
"I guess. And I accept your apology." After that, not another word was said for the night, they both went to sleep, though, feeling somehow better.

* * *

A/n: Short, not really action in it, but it was needed, like a bridge, I guess. So, please review if you feel like it. If you don't, I'll update soon anyway. 


	16. Chapter 16: Mastering Occlumency

Disclaimer: I own nothing.  
  
A/n: You all are just so great to write for. Hope it turns out longer, because even I don't know right now how it will turn out. He he he! I'm kind of making this up as I go along. Have fun and I hope that you enjoy it! Thank you to all my wonderful reviewers! Some of you are giving me ideas for future stories that may just work out.  
  
And can someone explain what a beta-reader is? I still am kind of new to this.  
  
Chapter 16: Mastering Occlumency  
  
Harry was in the Study again two days later, feeling much better, having eaten three full meals each day and regaining a strength that he had thought was lost to him. Now, he was physically ready for a lesson, although not mentally. He had tried to practice clearing his mind, but it was harder than he ever imagined. He couldn't manage to think about nothing. It was illogical, really, to think of nothing.  
  
So now, Harry was waiting for his Potion's master to get finished putting his thoughts into the Pensieve before beginning. Harry had a feeling that Snape was being considerably more careful every since the incident a couple of days ago. Finally, Snape turned and faced him, saying, "Get your wand ready, Potter." Harry obeyed, pulling it out of his back blue jeans pocket and readying himself. "One, Two, Three... Legilimens!"  
  
Harry's mind spun uncontrollably to different scenes in his life. He was in the Shrieking Shack, with Lupin and Sirius explaining what had happened twelve years previous. His memory changed to the time when he was with Cho Chang on Valentine's Day, and she had started to shout at him in front of everyone. 'Clear my mind,' Harry thought. He remembered all of the innocent souls that could be affected by his learning Occlumency, and a strong determination to learn consumed him. Harry concentrated on the darkness of the wall that had been behind Cho that day. He brought the wall closer in his mind, and the rest of the memory faded away. Eventually, the room came back into view, and so did Snape, standing in front of him with his wand raised. Harry gave one last final, mental push, and freed himself from the curse. Snape stumbled backwards a step or two, surprise showing through on his face.  
  
Snape didn't give Harry a chance to recover again, and thrust the curse back at the boy. But Harry was ready this time. He already had his mind cleared from the previous time, expecting Snape to re-launch his attack. Snape was shoved out of his mind in a matter of seconds. "Very well done, Mr. Potter," Snape said, which was the best compliment Snape had ever given him. Harry gave a small grin in return, pleased with himself. "When you master Occlumency, you will not even have to push me out of your mind, because I will not be able to see anything, anyway."  
  
"How long should it take before I am able to do that?" Harry asked anxiously.  
  
"At the rate you're going, maybe a week or so." At this comment, Harry was very proud of himself. He continued to practice Occlumency for the next thirty minutes. He pushed Snape out of his mind a couple more times, but after a while, he was becoming tired. The more tired he became, the harder it was to clear his mind. Snape, seeming to sense this, called it quits for the day. "Don't forget to clear your mind before you go to sleep tonight."  
  
"Yes sir," Harry replied. He thought that he could manage it, although now he was very weary, and his scar hurt immensely. He did not tell this to Snape, though. He wanted to prove that he could master Occlumency.  
  
Hedwig came back that evening, after being gone since Harry's arrival at Grimmauld Place. He was extremely happy to see her back, since he had missed her companionship immensely as a result of being stuck with Snape. He stroked her feathers gently, muttering, "Hey girl. I missed you."  
  
A voice behind him spoke. "You can write your friends if you wish, as long as you make it short and don't include too much information. I will read them before you send them off. They can reply if they feel like it."  
  
Harry nodded. He forced himself to say the next words: "Thank You."  
  
Taking the opportunity to talk with his friends, and half afraid that Snape would change his mind, Harry quickly went into his room and started penning two letters to his best friends in the world.  
  
"Ron,  
  
Hope your summer is better than mine. It is dreadfully dull here without you or Hermione. I have been practicing my remedial potions, and am doing much better at it now. I am looking forward to seeing all of you later on this summer, if at all possible. Tell your family I said 'Hello'. I have to keep it short for now, but please keep in touch.  
  
Your Friend,  
  
Harry"  
  
He wrote a similar letter to Hermione, also keeping it as short as he could. He looked over them, making sure that he had told nothing that would give out too much information should his letters be intercepted. Satisfied with what he had written, he handed them to his professor. Snape read each of the letters, and appeared satisfied with what Harry had written. "Go ahead and mail them off, Potter," Snape said, handing them back to Harry.  
  
"Thank you, sir," Harry answered respectfully.  
  
"You should be able to see them in a week or more," Snape said in a casual manner. "Maybe longer. That is when the headmaster is to return."  
  
Harry nodded a response, then turned to Hedwig, giving her his letters. "Take these to Ron and Hermione," he said to his faithful owl. With a hoot, she disappeared out the window. He sighed and turned back to the kitchen were he was standing. Dinner was on the table, and Snape was already eating. Harry sat down at the table across from his professor and began eating too. The silence was uncomfortable, though, and eventually, Harry broke down and began a conversation. "So, have you just hated me all these years because of my father?"  
  
Snape took a while to answer. "At first, yes. And after that, it always seemed that you were always breaking rules, as if they didn't apply to you; so I hated you for your arrogance. Last year, you were just another problem to deal with."  
  
"Oh. So, do you still hate me?"  
  
"Not really. I can't find a reason to anymore."  
  
"That's nice to know," Harry said, sarcasm dripping from his voice.  
  
"Of course, don't think that things will change in class."  
  
"Why not? I thought that you said that you didn't hate me now."  
  
Snape gave Harry the look that was meant to tell him he was being stupid. "Do you really think that I can let the Slytherin's know that? They are mostly the children of Death Eaters. To treat you civilly would arouse suspicion, and put all of my hard work on the line. The Dark Lord does not treat spies kindly when they are found."  
  
"I didn't think about that."  
  
"Of course you didn't. Always make sure that you are careful of what you say around people. They could always find out something that would endanger the Order."  
  
"I will be careful. You can count on it."  
  
Snape merely nodded, then continued eating. Harry ate also, not able to find anything to talk about. Conversations with his Potion's professor were still so awkward. It was hard to forget the years of ridicule, and the hate he had felt at the end of his fifth year.  
  
That night, before bed, Harry concentrated on clearing his mind. It was possibly the most boring thing he had ever done. He lay in bed, trying to clear all thought, and finding it near impossible. Somehow or another, he fell asleep while still attempting to clear his mind.  
  
The dream was a strange one. He was in a large field, with no trees or buildings in sight. He was utterly alone, except for a large snake that was slithering around his ankles. The grass around where he was standing was dead, and nothing else grew for a long distance on either side of him. "Yes, this is perfect," he said, feeling very pleased that hard effort had paid off. "Not long now, and you will feast on the flesh of the Potter boy. We will kill him this time. There is no opportunity to escape here. Just a little while longer." And with that, he began laughing.  
  
He awoke with a sick feeling in his bed. He felt ill as the happiness faded from memory, and his scar was hurting again. He wanted so much to tell what he had just witnessed in his dream. But to tell would mean that his failure would be evident, and that Snape would lose his new-found confidence in Harry. So, instead of saying anything, he lay back down, again attempting to clear his mind. He was more successful this time, and when he finally drifted back to sleep, it was a deep one, in which he had no dreams.

* * *

A/n: Not as long as I had hoped, but I hope you enjoy. Please R/r. 


	17. Chapter 17: What Dreams Are Made Of

Disclaimer: I own nothing from this story.  
  
A/n: Hi again. Sorry it is taking so long. It is hard to find time to do this anymore. So, here goes another fun-filled chapter. Hope that you will find it interesting. Don't forget to R/r after you read it, please.  
  
And I know that Occlumency takes a while to master, but for the sake of this story, it doesn't. Sorry for the inaccuracy.  
  
Chapter 17: What Dreams Are Made Of  
  
Harry was extremely tired the next morning. His dream had worn him out the night before. The only good thing was that he hadn't awoken screaming. He had firmly decided against telling Snape anything of the dreams. After all, the last time that he had had a dream like that, it had turned out to be false, and Sirius had gotten killed because of it. There was a good possibility that this would turn out to be no different. He was safe at Grimmauld Place.  
  
Harry walked down to Breakfast, only to find that Professor Snape wasn't there. It was strange, as his Professor never seemed to miss a meal. But, thinking little more of it, Harry got out bacon and eggs and made himself a nice breakfast. The meal was eaten alone, as even Hedwig was out on errands. Seeing as there was nothing else to do, Harry got out his Potions book and did what was left of his homework for the summer. When he had finished, Hedwig flew in with two letters attached to her leg. One was from Hermione, and the other from Ron. He eagerly opened and read them.  
  
He read the one from Ron first:  
  
"_Hi Harry,  
  
How's it going mate? Sorry that you have to spend your summer learning remedial Potions. Good luck. Mum told me we should be able to see you soon, but we're not sure when yet. Her exact words were "It depends." Hope it is soon though. The whole family wants me to tell you hello. Tell me what you got on your OWLs. I didn't get high enough on my Potions, Divination, or History grade to get into the NEWTS class, but I really don't care. I did get a high mark in Defense and Transfiguration. Can you believe it? Hermione couldn't. Well mate, I was told to keep it short. I'll see you around.  
  
Ron._"  
  
Harry smiled when he read about Ron's Divination results. It really was no great loss. He opened Hermione's letter next:  
  
"_Dear Harry,  
  
So glad to hear from you. I'm on vacation in Italy right now, but I will be returning at the end of the week. Really, I'm not interested in muggle Italy; it's the magical part I'm interested in. But of course, since I am with my family, I can't go there. I passed all of my OWLs, of course. I'm really proud of the fact. I wasn't too sure about my Astronomy, but I got passed that just fine. I really can't write long. The hotel people would have a fit if they saw an owl in the room. Hope I can see you soon.  
  
Love, Hermione_"  
  
Harry sat the letters aside, longing even more to see his two best friends. He was a bit sad for Hermione, who couldn't see the magical side of Italy, as he knew she had been wanting to since reading about it in History of Magic. He hoped it wouldn't be too long before he could see them again.  
  
The front door opened slowly and Harry looked over to see Snape walking in. The professor looked paler than usual, no matter how unimaginable that is. Harry knew better than to say anything, and watched as the professor carefully closed the door behind him. Snape looked directly at him, no emotion showing on his face whatsoever. "Do you need help, Professor?" Harry asked. Snape nodded his head, surprisingly.  
  
"Go into my room, and on the first shelf to your left you will find a small phial of a blue potion. There is only one. Bring it to me." Snape sat down in the nearest chair, looking tired and haggard. Harry immediately did as he was told. He went cautiously into his professor's room, a place where he had been forbidden from going. The potion was exactly where he had been told, and he grabbed it and went back downstairs, not pausing long enough to have his curiosity aroused by anything in the room.  
  
Harry gave the potion to his professor, who uncorked it and drank it all in one long swig. What little color had been there returned to his skin, and he looked considerably better. "What was that, sir?" Harry asked, curious.  
  
"A remedium crucio potion, which helps the effects of the cruciatus curse," Snape replied. He paused for a moment, as a tawny barn owl swept into the room, and left a letter from Hogwarts in Harry's hands.  
  
"A bit early this year, isn't it?" Harry asked.  
  
"McGonagall is trying to get everything done ahead of time."  
  
"When can I go to pick this up?"  
  
"Dumbledore suggested I take you when the letter came, I would disguise myself and take you myself. We will leave after lunch."  
  
"Thank you," Harry said, smiling inside, although keeping a calm face outwardly.  
  
Snape rose from his chair and went into the kitchen. "I may just eat early," he said. "I haven't eaten since last night." Harry looked at his watch and saw that it was nearly ten thirty. Leaving his professor in peace, Harry went upstairs to dress for Diagon Alley, packing his money in his right pocket to insure safekeeping.  
  
Two hours later, as promised, they departed for Diagon Alley via floo powder. Snape looked very unusual, with light brown hair, blue eyes, and a medium build. 'I wonder which potion he used,' Harry thought to himself. It was certainly a big difference from the tall, dark, and lanky potions professor. Of course, at Diagon alley, he wouldn't be Professor Snape; he would be Mr. Aquilus, a friend of the Weasley's, if any one should ask. (A/n: Aquilus is Latin for Dark. Pretty original huh? J/k.)  
  
"Where are we headed first?" Harry asked after arriving in Diagon Alley.  
  
"The Book Store. And we will waste no time here. You are to fetch your books, then we will continue to get you some new robes, and any other supplies you will need. You cannot risk being out of the house for more than a little at a time."  
  
"Fair enough," Harry said. He really couldn't think of a reason to stay long anyway. He wouldn't get to see Ron or Hermione anyway, so there would really be no point. It was crowded in Diagon alley for a day in late July. Thinking about the fact that it was July, Harry realized that his birthday was only two days away. With all that had been going on, he had almost completely forgotten about it.  
  
A large crowd pushed past Harry and "Mr. Aquilus", not even watching where they were going. Harry was annoyed, but refrained from making noise so that he would stay unnoticed by everyone. So far, amazingly, no one had really paid any attention to Harry. The fact was utterly surprising, since not long ago he had been the most talked about subject in all of Wizarding London. Shaking off the fact, the pair walked into the bookstore and searched for all of the books he needed.  
  
They were all found easily enough without the help of the bookstore owner, except for the last one, Transfiguration for the Newt Student. Harry and Mr. Aquilus looked everywhere for it, but were unable to find it. "Maybe it's over there," Harry suggested, pointing over to a table on the other side of the store.  
  
"Then go look," Snape ordered, still sifting in a pile of books. Harry did as told, and began shifting the books around, looking for the right one. "I believe you are looking for this one," a voice came from behind. Harry looked behind him to see that the speaker was an old man, with barely any teeth in his head. He held out the Transfiguration book that Harry was looking for. Harry didn't recognize the man from anywhere, and felt that he should be weary.  
  
"Thanks," Harry said. Something in the back of his mind wanted to refuse the book. But before he could protest that he didn't need any help, the book was shoved into his hands. Almost immediately he felt the familiar tug behind his navel, as the book became a portkey, dragging him away from the bookstore and from Snape's watchful eye.  
  
Harry landed with a thud on a grassy hillside and looked around. His eyes widened in fear and disbelief as he recognized his location. It was the same barren field that he had seen in his dreams. And standing not fifty feet away, was Lord Voldemort himself.

* * *

A/n: Not my best work, but it is longer. Please R/r. 


	18. Chapter 18: No Way Out

Disclaimer: None of this belongs to me.  
  
A/n: I just felt like writing again to keep all of your interests. Hope you enjoy the next chapter, and sorry for leaving you with a cliffhanger. I have to admit though, it is fun to do. Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter. And to lovablechick213, which song? I don't think I have heard it, but that is interesting that you think that.  
  
Enjoy. And don't forget to R/r.  
  
Chapter 18: No Way Out  
  
Harry's scar burned fiercely as he looked into the cold slits that were the eyes of the one and only Lord Voldemort, the most feared, Thing, in the entire wizarding world. His heart raced as the two stared at each other, Voldemort standing calmly, and Harry sitting on the ground, eyes almost closed with pain. "Let me take the time to welcome you to the last place you will be seen alive," Voldemort said, cruel laughter in his voice. "There is no way for you to escape. There are many strong wards here that allow only e and my loyal Deatheaters to come and go. So don't count on being saved this time, either. There will be no one to save you now." And with that, His laughter rang out into the afternoon air, a laughter that chilled Harry to the bone.  
  
As quickly as he could, Harry leapt off of the ground and reached for his wand. "Expelliamrus!" Voldemort said casually, before Harry even had a good grip on it. The boy mentally cussed. Now he was completely defenseless. "How sad. Now little Potter hasn't even got a wand. Shame." Voldemort took Harry's own wand and aimed it at him, then shouted, "_Crucio_!" And with that, Harry's entire body burned with pain down to his bones. Every ounce of his being was in the utmost pain. The scar upon his head ached with such ferocity that he feared his head would split open. And just as it had begun, the curse ended.  
  
Harry realized that he was down on his knees, and that a deatheater was standing nearby. "Bound his hands," Voldemort ordered. Harry could not muster the strength to resist as his hands were forced roughly behind his back and tied together. The deatheater turned his attention back to his lord. "We can leave for now. The meeting will not be until this evening, and it's not like he has a chance of escaping."  
  
"If it pleases my lord," a cold voice began behind the mask, "I can make sure that he does not budge until we return."  
  
"Go ahead. Have your fun, Lucius."  
  
The deatheater, now revealed as Lucius Malfoy, turned back to Harry and aimed his wand at the boy. "_Subsido_," Malfoy muttered. And with that simple spell, Harry found that he was incapable of movement anywhere below his shoulders. Another spell was muttered. "_Adflictatio_." Another eruption of pain coursed through his veins, not as bad as Crucio, but still very painful nonetheless. "I would suggest you try to get comfortable," Lucius sneered, then laughed hideously.  
  
Harry had no choice. He was trapped. Trapped until nightfall, when they would come and watch him be slaughtered like an animal that was hunted just for sport. He raised his head and watched his captors leave through a transparent shield. "Help me!" he screamed as loud as he could. But because of the spells holding him, and the pain he had just been forced to endure, he could not muster enough energy to scream again.

* * *

At headquarters, panic ensued. Everyone had been called for an emergency meeting. Dumbledore had just returned from a trip to the United States, Lupin had come from Transylvania, and McGonagall had just come from China. The rest of the order came from wherever they were; all not knowing what was going on, except for Snape.  
  
Snape was back to his usual form, except for the fact that his facial features showed more concern that what anyone had ever seen. "I called you all here," he began, "because Mr. Potter has been kidnapped. Again."  
  
"What do you mean kidnapped?" Lupin asked, rage and worry evident in his voice.  
  
"I mean, that a portkey was obviously shoved into his hands earlier, and he was taken away from Diagon Alley. Right from under my nose." Had Sirius been there, Snape realized, that would have been an open invitation for an insult. As he was not, silence followed the statement.  
  
"Do you know where he was taken?" Dumbledore asked gently.  
  
"No. The Dark Lord does not let all of us know his plans until the last minute. We do not even know of is location until the mark begins to burn. I was told last night to bring my worst potions to the next meeting, though."  
  
"Then we have no choice," Dumbledore said sadly. "We cannot save him yet. It is up to you, Severus. We will try to save him if we can, but if it comes to the point where Voldemort will kill him, then you must save him. Get him out if you can."  
  
"I will." Snape promised. Everyone knew that if Snape made a promise, he would keep it. No matter what.  
  
"I will give you a simple piece of parchment," Dumbledore said. "This parchment will allow us to be able to tell your location. If possible, we will try and save Harry ourselves. If we can't, you must be the one to save him."  
  
"I understand."  
  
"Until then, there is nothing we can do but wait until Severus is called," Dumbledore said. Everyone noticed the look of extreme pain and worry in his face and voice as he spoke. McGonagall sobbed into a tissue.  
  
"Do not fret, Minerva," Dumbledore said. "We will save Harry." No one could altogether be convinced, though. Even Dumbledore did not seem to sure of this fact.

* * *

Harry struggled with all of his might, yet could not budge an inch from where he knelt on the ground. He watched with fear and an understanding of what was about to happen as the sun began to set upon the horizon. He wasn't sure that he could be saved this time. He wasn't sure that anyone would be able to risk it.  
  
Voldemort and Malfoy came back as the last rays of sun disappeared from the barren field. "It is time," Voldemort hissed. His snake Nagini slithered near his heels, flicking its tongue as though to smell Harry's fear. Malfoy held out his arm, and Voldemort touched the Mark, causing it to burn on all of his death eaters. "Now, release him," Voldemort ordered. "He wont go anywhere."  
  
Malfoy did as ordered, and the spell was released. Harry fidgeted with the ropes behind his back, but he was bound tightly, and the robes seemed to cling together. "Don't struggle," Malfoy sneered. Two voices cackled into the air of the fresh night. Nearby, death eaters began arriving at a steady flow. They began forming a circle around Voldemort and Harry, a scene which had been replayed in Harry's memory and nightmares for over a year. They were doing the same thing as they had during the Triwizard Tournament, except this time, they would not take the chance of giving Harry back his wand.  
  
"Where are my potions?" Voldemort asked of the masked crowd. A lone death eater strode forward, and handed several small phials to the sinister figure. Voldemort pulled one out of the pile, and handed it back to the death eater. "Give him this one first," he commanded.  
  
"Yes, my lord. As you wish." The voice was one that Harry knew all to well. It was none other than the Potions master, reporting for duty as the loyal servant of Lord Voldemort.  
  
Snape's long fingers uncorked the potion, and pried open Harry's mouth. "Drink," Snape ordered in a deadly voice. Harry tried to keep from swallowing, but Snape held his mouth and nose, until he had no choice but to swallow in order to breathe again.  
  
The effects were instantaneous. Harry felt a raw burning course through his stomach and the rest of his body. The pain was terrible, and Harry wanted so much to douse the fire, but he was unable to move from his position, as he was doubled over in pain. 'Snape isn't here to help,' Harry though, as the pain slowly subsided. 'He's doing his job. Nothing more. I am alone. There is no way out.' And Harry braced himself for whatever would come next.

* * *

A/n: Have fun until next time. Please r/r. Sorry its short. Just wanted to give you another cliffhanger. 


	19. Chapter 19: To Wish for The End

Disclaimer: None of the following story belongs to me.  
  
Hi again. I love writing for you all, and since my mind is fresh with ideas, I figured I had better go ahead and write. Sorry for making any of you mad with the cliffhanger, I just couldn't resist. It was a perfect place to leave it. And aljake- I live in the old north state, (NC in case u didn't know). But why? Thanks for reviewing. Thanks to all of you. I always enjoy reading what my readers have to say.  
  
Hope you enjoy this next chapter.  
  
Chapter 19: To Wish for the End  
  
Harry felt hopeless and lost. He was surrounded by the loyal followers of Lord Voldemort, and Snape would not help him this time. It would risk too much of his work to save Harry. Harry had no choice but to just prepare for whatever would come next.  
  
Voldemort hissed softly, "That hurt, Little Potter, didn't it?" The death eaters laughed. "How embarrassing for you this must be, to be at the mercy of yours truly, and not be able to escape."  
  
"How embarrassing," Harry retorted, "it must have been when I escaped from you in my fourth year. And again just a couple of months ago. How could you face your death eaters again, knowing that you had failed to do what you had planned? How could they really believe that you were the great wizard that they thought you were after that?"  
  
"Shut up," Lucius hissed, and kicked Harry in the side. "Have respect for the bringer of your death."  
  
"He will learn to respect me before he dies," Voldemort sneered. "Crucio!"  
  
Harry felt the pain again that was becoming all too familiar. He heard a scream of pain, and realized that the sound of agony was being issued forth from his own mouth. When the spell was released, Harry lay panting on the ground, gasping for breath. That spell felt like it had hit him in the lungs.  
  
"Tie him up," Voldemort commanded, summoning a large table before the large crowd. Harry looked over, and through blurry vision he saw chains on the table, meant to bound him so he wouldn't ever escape alive. He felt the impending dread of knowing that this would probably be the last place he would ever see alive. He wished so sorely that he could at least see Ron and Hermione first, or tell Dumbledore that he was sorry for making a mess of his office last year, or tell Remus that he was truly sorry that he had caused Sirius to die, and taken away Remus's last true friend.  
  
He was hauled to his feet by two very large men, and brought over to the table. He struggled weakly, but it did no good. The men forced him to lie down on the table, and clasped the chains onto his arms and legs. 'If I only had my wand,' he thought forlornly. Then, he remembered something very important. He hadn't always needed a wand to do his magic. There were times, in great stress, when anger flowed through him without the wand. It was just possible that he could do it again. This was certainly a time of stress. Bringing all of his pain and emotion to the surface, he focused on the large crowd of death eaters that were in his line of vision. Thinking the spell just like he would if he had his wand, he summoned forth an energy that surprised even him. The sudden burst of magic pushed at least five death eaters onto the ground fiercely, causing them to land with a loud thud. One of the five had hit his head on a rock nearby, and was unconscious for the time being. Harry was proud of what he had done, but knew that the spell had not been strong enough to set him free.  
  
The chains were still holding him down, and the wards were still active over the place where the gathering was. He couldn't get out this time. There would be no way.

* * *

Dumbledore had fixed on Snape's location, and the Order was trying to find a way in. "This barrier is made so that no one can get in unless You-Know- Who wants them to," McGonagall reported. "It will take a while to break down the barriers, and we might be too late by then."  
  
"Will Severus be able to get Harry out of there?" Dumbledore asked, concerned by the new information.  
  
"I don't know. It may be possible. But unless the barriers are weakened considerably, than I fear we will never see Mr. Potter alive again."

* * *

Harry's scream issued forth from the field again. The pain was so bad that he was screaming himself horse. A knife was being dug into his hand, entering through the palm and exiting on the other side. The pain was so bad that he could feel it through ever ounce of his body. The knife was finally removed from his hand, but the pain was still there, and blood issued forth from his hand at a rapid rate.  
  
"Did that hurt?" Voldemort asked, laughter in his voice. "I'm sure it did. I will cause you pain so badly that you will wish for death before the end."  
  
'I already do wish for death,' Harry thought. But he said nothing, as he could not let Voldemort know that he was weakening.  
  
"Everyone here wants some fun tonight," Voldemort continued. "So let's see. Let's find memories of yours; painful ones."  
  
"Legilimens!" Voldemort cried, bringing the spell that had become familiar to Harry's ears. Harry had taken the words to heart before the spell had come, and had successfully blocked his mind. Voldemort probed through, and Harry felt as though his mind would weaken and break at any time. But he held true, and with what little power he could manage to muster up, pushed Voldemort from his mind.  
  
Voldemort looked surprised to say the least. He hadn't expected to be thrown from the mind of someone who was only almost 16. And yet, it had happened. He had been shoved from the mind of the boy. Voldemort quickly regained his composure. "So, Dumbledore must have taught you to defend yourself. I should have expected as much. No matter, I don't need Occlumency to force you to relive your worst memories. Severus, you know which potion I will ask for."  
  
Snape strode forward and handed Voldemort a potion that was a silvery- purple. Voldemort put his hands on Harry's face, causing the scar upon Harry's forehead to burn even more fiercely than before. As Harry opened his mouth to scream, Voldemort poured the potion down his throat. Harry coughed and sputtered for a moment after Voldemort released him, but then agony seized Harry's mind. He saw Sirius dying again. The look of laughter dying on his face as he fell behind the veil, never to be seen again. The potion chose another memory to bring forth; the memory of the graveyard; a situation so similar to this one.  
  
Harry screamed for release as he felt the Cruciatus again through his memory, and was writhing in pain on the table in which he was being kept a prisoner. Another potion was poured into his throat, and he relaxed as the memory faded. "The mind is a wonderful, mysterious thing, isn't it?" Voldemort said. "Through bringing forth those memories, you felt the pain of them all over again."  
  
Lucius Malfoy drew forward again, a knife in his hand. The dagger was already wet with blood from where it had dug into his hand earlier. Harry tensed as the dagger grew nearer. Malfoy put the knife against the flesh in Harry's stomach, and drew the blade across. It didn't go deep, only deep enough to pierce through the skin and cause it to bleed freely. Another death eater walked forward and withdrew a tube from his pocket. Inside the tube was a strange looking worm. The worm was released from its enclosure, and onto Harry. It found the blood immediately, and buried itself in Harry's skin.

* * *

Harry was screaming so badly that Snape could hardly bare to listen to it. The pain was profound, he knew. Normally, a person was not tortured so thoroughly. But this was Harry Potter, and the Dark Lord was going to make sure that he did the job right this time. Snape didn't know how much longer the boy could hold out, or how much longer before Voldemort finally decided to kill him. For the first time in his life, Snape felt compassion and pity for the boy, but neither of these emotions could he display, or else it would mean both of there lives.

* * *

The worm made its way to Harry's neck, where Lucius cut it out with the dagger and placed it back into the tube it had been in. Harry's voice was hoarse from screaming, and he felt that he wouldn't be able to take whatever was going to happen next. Voldemort had been right, he did wish for the end. He wished it would come right now, and take him away. But he knew better, and he knew that Voldemort would not be done with him yet.  
  
Spells and potions continued to wrack his body, and the pain grew each time in intensity. No one came to rescue him. Not one soul came to ease his suffering. His one hope, Snape, continued to watch, and force-feed potions to the boy. It was horrible, knowing that he was doomed and being kept alive for sport. "Please, ease my pain. Kill me now," he whispered to Snape, so that no one else could hear him. Snape didn't answer.  
  
"What did he say, Severus?" Voldemort questioned.  
  
"He asked for me to kill him."  
  
"Foolish boy. We are not done with you yet." Harry heard these words and cringed. He willed himself to die. He willed himself to just let go. But he didn't. for some reason, he continued to hold on, even though his entire body felt as though it were being burned. He held on.  
  
Snape watched as the boy's screams got weaker, and his body grew limper. He knew that if Voldemort did not kill him soon, than the boy's body would simply give out in a short amount of time.  
  
"Give him another," Voldemort commanded of Snape. Snape chose a special potion from the folds of his robe, and strode forward with it. Uncorking it, he didn't even have to pry open the boy's mouth to get it poured in. Harry's mouth was hanging slightly open, and he looked about ready to quit. The boy didn't even bother to scream this time, as there was no need to. In a sudden, quick move, the entire contents of the potion were poured into Harry's mouth, and...

* * *

"They might be able to get out, but we can't get in," Tonks reported.  
  
"It may be too late," Mundungus Fletcher said. "I've heard how these things go. Even for Harry, it should be over now."  
  
"Severus wouldn't let him die, would he, Albus?" Minerva questioned.  
  
"If it is in his power, he will rescue the boy," Dumbledore said, more confidently than he felt.

* * *

The crowd watched as nothing happened to the boy. No screaming, no writhing. He simply went limp on the table. In a flash of speed that almost no one saw coming, Snape wrapped his arms around the boy, and appearated away from the field, and toward the safety of Grimmauld Place.

* * *

A/n: Surprised? In suspense? I'll try to update soon. Please r/r. 


	20. Chapter 20: Stories Retold Surviving the...

Disclaimer: I own nothing  
  
Hey again. Thank you all so much for your positive reviews. To lostdreamer23, thank you for telling me about the dialogue. As I have said before, I do not mind constructive criticism. I will try and take your advice about making the dialogue longer. And could someone please explain to me what a beta reader is and how to get one??? I would really appreciate it if someone could. And heart of the wizard, I just couldn't leave you hanging there with nothing else. So, for all of my wonderful readers, I have decided to update sooner than I was originally planning.  
  
And here is the next exciting chapter of "To Wish One Could Forget". Enjoy. And please R/r after you finish. (I love hearing what you have to say, good or bad.)  
  
Chapter 20: Stories Retold/ Surviving the Night (This Chapter gets two titles)  
  
Snape landed smoothly onto the warm grass of the front lawn of Number 12, Grimmauld Place, with Harry lying motionless in his arms. Looking around to make sure that no muggles were watching from windows or doors, he concentrated on the address, and the house appeared into his vision. He picked up the boy as gently as he could manage, and carried him to the front of the house. Even before he could reach the doorknob, the door was pulled open by Madame Pomfrey herself.  
  
Madame Pomfrey stifled a small cry of alarm. She saw the stillness of the boy, and recognized what she had seen more times than anyone knew. "He's dead," she whispered in a small, startled voice.  
  
Snape laid Harry's body on a couch in the room. "No," Snape said coolly. "He's just not breathing."  
  
"Professor Snape, of all people! If a person isn't breathing, that normally means the person is dead."  
  
"These aren't normal circumstances though, are they?" From a fold in his robes, he pulled out a small, shimmering white liquid held in a small phial. Opening the boy's mouth, he poured in the contents. Poppy Pomfrey watched in utter amazement as Harry's chest rose largely, as though taking a breath, and then exhaled. He began to breathe once more.  
  
"Dear heavens," she whispered in amazement. "You brought him back!"  
  
"I don't know for how long," Snape said worriedly. "He's in bad shape. He may not last through the night. I'll take him upstairs to his room, where you can attend to him. Meanwhile, I will contact Albus and the rest of the Order as to where Mr. Potter is." Using his wand, he levitated Harry's body up the stairs and into his room, then left Poppy to her work after telling her which potions had been used on the boy.  
  
Fawkes was sitting on the back of a chair at the kitchen table. He seemed to have been waiting for Snape to arrive, as he looked expectantly in his direction when he entered the room. Taking a piece of parchment from a pocket in his robes, Snape scribbled the message, "HP and SS back at GP. Come ASAP." He handed the message to the beautiful phoenix, who took it gently into his beak. "Take this to Dumbledore," Snape ordered. With a beautiful display of color and light, the bird disappeared, and set out to find his master.  
  
Snape made his way back to Harry's room, where Madame Pomfrey was fretting horribly. "I don't have all of the potions I need," she said. "There might not be time to get the ones I need. What happened out there?"  
  
"You don't want to know," Snape whispered. He hadn't expected it to go this far. He hadn't really thought that he would have to be the one to rescue the boy. Now, everything had changed. The boy was surely going to die, and so was he. They both needed rescuing now, and there was no one who could. "The potions you need should be in the basement," Snape said. "They are all labeled and alphabetized, so you shouldn't have trouble finding them. I need to wait for Albus." With a dramatic swish of the robes, Snape disappeared, leaving Poppy watching after him.  
  
Snape had barely gotten downstairs when Dumbledore appeared in the middle of the study, with Fawkes on his shoulder. He looked extremely tired and angry, all at the same time. He didn't even smile like usual when he turned to address Snape. "What happened?" he asked, with what looked like fear in his normally sparkling eyes.  
  
"Something no one should ever have to live through."  
  
"Tell me everything, as quickly as you can," Dumbledore said. "Harry is still alive, isn't he?" he asked, studying the look of worry on Snape's face.  
  
"For now. They did almost everything imaginable to torture him." And with that, Snape began telling a condensed version of what happened in that field, although still giving enough detail to allow Dumbledore to picture everything that had happened.  
  
"Why did he stop breathing?" Dumbledore questioned.  
  
"It was the only way to get him out of there. The way I was thinking, Voldemort put wards up to keep Harry from getting out alive. If he wasn't breathing, than I would be able to appearate him past the wards. It worked, at least. I had just enough time to get him past the wards and to Headquarters before the effects of the potion were permanent. I gave him the antidote, and he started breathing again immediately."  
  
"And honestly tell me, Severus, if you think he will live or not. I want to know what we can expect."  
  
"Not many people could survive that. He was asking for me to kill him before it was over. I don't know if he has the willpower to save himself this time"  
  
Tears formed in Dumbledore's eyes as Snape spoke. "No one should go through that, let alone a child. Let me see him now." Snape nodded, and led the way to Harry's room. He was moaning and thrashing in bed now, and Madame Pomfrey looked distraught as she tried everything to get him to settle down.  
  
"I can't give him any more potions right now," she said. "It would kill him. I took care of the most crucial things. I don't know if he will make it. That would be a miracle upon miracle if he did."  
  
"Then, we must do something that wizards normally don't resort to. We must pray, and hope for the best."  
  
Poppy nodded. "I'm so tired, Headmaster. Would you mind terribly if I took a brief nap?"  
  
"Not at all. There is nothing more you can do for the present. If we need you, we will call." Nodding, she left the room, going to a spare bedroom to sleep briefly.  
  
"What happened after the members of the death eater meeting left?" Snape inquired after her departure.  
  
"We caught a lot of them. No one even saw Voldemort slip past. We had summoned a large number of Aurors to assist us, and they arrived right as the death eaters were leaving. Malfoy escaped, of course. Several of the aurors and members of the Order had to be taken to St. Mungos, but no one on our side died."  
  
"On our side?"  
  
"Moody got a little carried away with one of them who was trying to hex Tonks behind her back, and he accidentally killed him."  
  
"Not surprising," Snape muttered.  
  
"I suppose not," Dumbledore agreed halfheartedly. He rose suddenly. "I must visit the others. Stay here and watch after him. Let no one else in here save for Poppy and me. No one," Dumbledore stressed.  
  
"You can count on me," Snape said. And to prove it, he pulled out his wand and crossed his arms over his chest.  
  
"That reminds me," Dumbledore said, reaching into his pocket. He pulled out Harry's wand. "We found this at the field after the fight was over. I believe he should want this back when he awakens."  
  
"I will see that he gets it," Snape said smoothly.  
  
Without another word, Dumbledore left. Snape sat down on the unoccupied chair beside Harry's bed. He felt sorry for the boy, an emotion he normally reserved for no one. He could no longer feel hostile toward the young boy. And more surprisingly than all, Snape was worried, and was honestly hoping that the boy would survive the night.  
  
Snape got comfortable in the easy chair that was there, and was dosing off when the door creaked open. In utter amazement, Snape watched as a large black dog sauntered slowly into the room and closed the door behind him. "No one else is supposed to be in here," Snape dictated slowly. The dog gave a look of utter disbelief, if dogs are capable of doing so. The dog chose to ignore what Snape had said, and climbed onto the foot of Harry's bed, then nestled himself down into the covers and drifted asleep. Feeling that Dumbledore had not meant to exclude this particular animal, Snape followed suit, drifting into a light sleep, in which he would awaken should anything happen.  
  
A/n: SOOO.........what do you all think? Please R/r. Next chapter may take a little while longer. 


	21. Chapter 21: A Friend in Need

Disclaimer: I own nothing.  
  
A/n: Couldn't help it. I have the time, so I am going to write some more. I should hope that you might like this next part. For some of you, this will be a very interesting chapter that you may enjoy immensely. For others, like Katie for instance, you will be disappointed by corniness. I'm truly sorry, but I couldn't help it. I promise that it won't take too much away from the Snape and Harry relationship. Don't get too Confused, and thank you for the positive reviews. Hopefully, I will have a beta reader soon. Please R/r, and thanks for reading this story.  
  
Chapter 21: A Friend in Need  
  
Snape stirred early in the morning, at 3:30 am precisely, and wondered as to what could be awakening him this early in the morning. He looked over to the sleeping Harry, and saw that the boy was shifting restlessly in his bed, and moaning, obviously having a terrible nightmare. The dog had been awakened, too, and was standing beside the bed in a look of worry, whining deep in his throat. Snape walked to the door to contact Poppy, but was surprised when she came into the room, summoned by some unknown precognition that medi-witches somehow developed after years of working with patients.  
  
"His pain potion is wearing off," she commented, answering the unspoken question on Snape's mind. "And I am sure that he will need a Dreamless Sleep until later." From a deep pocket in her robes, she withdrew two potions, and fed them down the boy's throat. She looked beside the bed, and saw the animal that stood, watching the entire scene with interest. "I do not appreciate having animals near my patients."  
  
"This particular animal will be staying here for tonight," Snape said firmly. "Dumbledore would appreciate it, I am sure, if you were to let the mutt stay. He is doing no harm."  
  
With a look of serious skepticism on her face, Madame Pomfrey consented, and started to leave the room. "If Dumbledore complains to me about a dog being in this room, then I will personally inform him that it was your bright idea." And then she left.  
  
Snape settled back into his chair, although he did not go to sleep. He glanced over and saw that he dog was staring at him intensely. "Oh, don't act so surprised. I'm not that heartless."  
  
The dog let a heavy sigh escape, and finally settled back onto the foot of the sleeping boy's bed. Snape stayed awake for the rest of the night, having slept more in the last few hours than he normally would have. The dog drifted back to sleep, feeling happy and safe where it was for the moment. That was how they were all found at around 6:00 the next morning, when Professor Dumbledore stepped into the room.  
  
"Ah, glad to see that you're awake, Severus," Dumbledore started in a low voice. The dog awoke immediately, but wagged its tail at the sight of Dumbledore. Dumbledore looked at the dog and smiled. "I'm glad to see you back, Snuffles," he said to the dog. "I believe that it is safe for you, now. The only people here are members of the Order."  
  
The dog nodded its head once, then transformed into the figure of a man who everyone knew as Sirius Black. "I'm glad to be back, Albus," Black said. "Can you tell me what has happened to my godson, and will he be alright?"  
  
"It is a very long story, Sirius, Why don't you come downstairs while I explain it to the rest of the Order?"  
  
"Then who will stay with Harry? Who will be here when he awakens? I don't want him to be left alone."  
  
"Although it is unlikely that he will awaken as of yet," Snape began, "I will stay with him. I already know what happened."  
  
"You were there?" Black asked.  
  
"Snape was the one who rescued Mr. Potter from certain death," Dumbledore kindly explained. "Now, come downstairs. There are people who I am sure will be glad to see you."  
  
Sirius nodded, and followed Dumbledore down into the kitchen, where most of the Order was, ready to hear what had happened during the previous night. At the sight of Sirius Black, many gasped in amazement, and others burst into joyous praises, glad to see that he was indeed alive. Lupin came up and shook his hand, saying, "I'm glad to see you back, old friend." There was a tear building in his eye.  
  
"It's good to be back," Sirius responded. And with that, he hugged his old friend in a brotherly embrace.  
  
"What happened?" Tonks asked incredulously. "We thought you were dead."  
  
"I think I was. But I will explain later. For now, let us hear what Dumbledore has to tell us." And with that, the Order of the Phoenix sat down, and listened as Dumbledore recited the story that Snape had told last night. During several parts, there were gasps from the crowd, and swearing from many. At last, the story was finished, and an astonished crowd stared in disbelief at Dumbledore. Molly Weasley had tears in her eyes, as did Tonks and McGonagall, while several other members just looked pale in the face, and like they were going to be sick.  
  
"And he is going to make it, right?" Sirius asked, in the concern a father would show for his own son.  
  
"That is not yet known," Dumbledore answered sadly.  
  
"When can we see him?" Ron and Hermione asked in unison. The members of the Order looked in their direction.  
  
"You aren't supposed to be in here," Mrs. Weasley snapped.  
  
"It's alright, Molly," Dumbledore soothed. "They have a right to know."  
  
"But when can we see him?" Hermione pressed. "Please, we're his best friends. We want to be there for him."  
  
"I think you should be able to see him by now. But you all will not go in there like a pack of dogs. You are to go in, a couple of people at a time. You can't stay long; Poppy would kill me if I allowed you too. Do not be surprised at his condition; he had a very rough night, and he is not out of the woods yet. Professor Snape will remain in there, as he knows which potions to administer should anything go wrong." From Ron's corner of the room, the comment, "greasy git," could be heard. "Ron!" hissed Mrs. Weasley.  
  
"Ms. Granger, Mr. Weasley, please follow me," Dumbledore ordered, and led the way to the stairs and the room that they had shared only the previous summer. When the first saw their friend, pale and lying helplessly on the covers, they gasped in an expression of their own emotional pain."  
  
"How is he doing, Severus?" Dumbledore asked.  
  
"Not well," Snape reported. "I just ran a scan of his injuries, and it appears that his heart and lungs are failing."  
  
"Failing? But, why?" Ron asked.  
  
"Certain potions that were used on him directly affected his heart and lungs. It doesn't help that we could not completely help him last night."  
  
"Can we do anything?" Hermione asked.  
  
"There is an herb," Snape started. "Its magical properties should not interfere with the potions we have used on Mr. Potter. It is called _Cordis consanesco_. If you can find it in time, then it may be able to help him."  
  
"I know that one," Hermione said. "It is red, shaped like a heart."  
  
"Valentine shaped?" Ron asked.  
  
"No. Like a real heart looks, except not as detailed. It is very rare, though, and only grows in certain places."  
  
"Take Hagrid and Lupin with you to the Dark Forest," Dumbledore started. "I have seen it growing there at times. It grows near the lake, so it should not be too hard to find. And do be careful."  
  
"We will," Hermione said confidently, then tugged on Ron's arm for him to follow her.  
  
"Do you think they will find it?" Snape asked.  
  
"Yes. And even if they don't, it will keep them occupied, and being occupied is what they need right now, so they do not dwell on their suffering friend.

* * *

"I know that plant," Hagrid said, as he talked with Ron and Hermione. "Me 'n Fang see it sometimes, when we're out in the Forest."  
  
"Yes. I do remember that particular plant," Lupin said. "Do they really think this will help?"  
  
"That is what we were told," Hermione answered. "And I do remember reading about the astounding healing properties of this herb."  
  
"Then let's not waste time," Lupin commanded. "Everyone, grab my hands." Doing as commanded, they formed a large circle. Using all of the magic he could muster, he apparated (A/n: I spelled it right!) them to the edge of the Forbidden Forest. The first sight to greet them, though, were several large Centaurs, aiming arrows straight at the four.  
  
"Please," Hagrid pleaded. "Let us get somethin' we need."  
  
"You should know better than to venture into the Forest at these Dark Times," a large centaur said in a deep voice.  
  
"Please sir," Hermione practically cried. "It is for a friend of ours, in serious need. Please, let us help him and we will leave as soon as we get what we came here for."  
  
The centaurs conversed quietly, then lowered their weapons. "We have seen you before, Hagrid, and know that you are a good person. For this reason, we will allow you to complete your errand of importance. But be careful, for many Dark people and things have made their presence known in the forest since last night."  
  
"We will be careful," Hagrid said confidently. And with that, the small band of heroes walked forward, out to find an herb that could very possibly help their dear friend.  
  
A/n: How did you like it? I will try and update soon, but I don't know when soon will be. Please R/r. (I'll explain Sirius to you all next time.) 


	22. Chapter 22: Worry and Turmoil

Disclaimer: I own nothing.  
  
A/n: Well, I have to say that you all are very entertaining when it comes to your reviews ;), and that you all bring up very good points that I missed when writing my story. (oops). Forgive me for that! I want to give a special thank-you to lovablechick213, who has offered to beta-read my chapters (and you all know that I need that). As for the rest of you reviewers:  
  
The-Bass-Player312- thanks as always for reviewing; and don't worry, I don't mind how long they are.  
  
Makalani Astral- you don't know how right you are  
  
Fanes- you are so welcome  
  
TigerLily Padfoot- actually, he did know who Sirius was; there was never anything to indicate that he didn't. that is why he allowed the dog to stay in the room. The answer to the questions in your chapter 20 review are answered in chapter 21.  
  
Diane- you are right, of course. I'll try to fix that in this chapter and whatever follows. Thank you for pointing that out to me.  
  
Insanechildfanfic- glad that you like it!  
  
Padawan Jan-AQ- I hope they find it too. Thanks for reviewing  
  
Confused- I had the bleeding heart in mind, although it is not entirely that. The bleeding heart is much smaller, and more of a flower, while this is the description of a leaf of a particular herb. And the bleeding heart is shaped like a valentine, while this plant is shaped like a true heart. You'll see. Good guess though.  
  
Volleypickle16- glad that you enjoyed this chapter  
  
Ebony S. Potter- glad that you saw it. I'll review as often as possible.  
  
Lady Lily 3- we'll just have to see (hey that rhymes!)  
  
Jasmine- here you go, enjoy it! (  
  
HoofsTails Gal- I am so happy that it gave you chills. But please, do not jump off of your computer. (That would hurt)  
  
And to lovablechick213- thanks as always for reviewing. Glad you liked it.  
  
And here goes Chapter 22. Enjoy it, and as always, please R/r.  
  
Chapter 22: Worry and Turmoil  
  
Sirius had made his way back to Harry's room, and had relieved Snape of 'guard duty', as Moody called it, and was sitting near his bedside. He was clutching the boy's hand frantically, trying to somehow pull the boy out of the unconscious state that he was in. It didn't seem to be working though, since Harry had not moved since his arrival in the room. Sirius had even resorted to trying to talk to the boy, although he expected no real response.  
  
Although he had slept most of the night through, Sirius fell asleep at the bedside, sick with worry and fear for what may happen to his best friend's only son. He hadn't been asleep long, when a voice pulled him back to a wakeful state. "Sirius..." a voice called from a seemingly far off place. Sirius looked over to Harry's bed, and saw the boy, moaning and moving in his bed. "Sirius...my fault," Harry said in a barely audible voice.  
  
"What's your fault, Harry?" Sirius asked in a voice equally as quiet as Harry's.  
  
"He died. Sirius. My fault. I should have known. My fault," the boy whimpered.  
  
"No, no it's not, Harry," Sirius insisted. "I'm right here, and I'm not leaving until you are well again."  
  
"Sirius," Harry moaned. And then he fell silent, drifting back into the unconscious state.  
  
"I am so sorry," Sirius said into the boy's ear.

* * *

Meanwhile, the small group of crusaders were making their way through the forest, in search of the plant that could very possible help their friend, and hero of the Wizarding world. They were near the lake, where the herb was supposed to be. Hermione was searching very close to the ground. "It grows in shaded, moist places," she commented, although it sounded that she was talking to herself.  
  
"Well then, we have a lot of ground to cover." Lupin muttered. He had just now realized how large the lake really was, and how impossible it seemed to find a single plant.  
  
"What color is it?" Ron asked.  
  
"It's a very dark green," Hermione responded.  
  
"But there are so many dark green plants!" Hagrid said, frustrated. "How are we to find it?"  
  
"I don't know," Hermione said. She drifted away from the group a little, following a stream of water that led into the woods a little farther.  
  
"It seems like we will never find it!" Ron said in frustration.  
  
"You won't," they heard a sinister voice from behind them. They all turned suddenly, and came face to face with none other than Lucius Malfoy.  
  
"Go away, Lucius," Lupin commanded.  
  
"And who are you to command me what to do?" Malfoy taunted. His wand was aimed at the group, and all of them did not have their wands prepared. "The Dark Lord will be very happy when he sees that I have caught friends of Harry Potter. And I shall bring all of you to him single-handedly.  
  
"No you won't," came a voice from beside of them. A jet of blue came from that direction, knocking Malfoy onto the ground and unconscious.  
  
"Hermione, that was brilliant!" Ron shouted. Everyone had completely forgotten that Hermione had gone off from the group. It was a lucky thing that she had.  
  
"Thank you," Hermione said.  
  
"Well, I think we should tie him up and continue the search," Lupin said in a suggestive manner.  
  
"There's no need," Hermione stated. From her pocket, she drew out a dark green plant that was oddly shaped like a human heart. "Bloody brilliant, right Ron?" Hermione said, grinning.  
  
"No kidding!" And with that, the small group joined hands again, and apparated to Number 12, Grimmauld street. They landed with a soft thud (except for Hagrid, of course), and rushed to the kitchen, where several of the Order members were sitting and talking.  
  
"We found it!" Ron and Hermione shouted upon entering the room. Snape, who was sitting at the table, looked at them with careful scrutiny for a moment, and then he asked to be shown the herb. Hermione handed him the leaves, and watched as he looked at them carefully.  
  
"Very well done," he commented. "I will brew a potion with this immediately." And with that, Snape left to brew the potion that Harry would need. Upon looking around, Hermione noticed that Lupin was gone, and knew immediately where he would be.

* * *

Lupin arrived into Harry's room, and saw Sirius sitting anxiously at his side. "How is he doing?" Lupin asked his old friend.  
  
"Not well. I think he is going to be delirious with fever."  
  
"Not entirely unexpected," Lupin commented. He paused for a moment, trying to find words to put into his next question, but decided to just go ahead and say it. "Where have you been, Sirius?"  
  
Sirius looked at him with his grey eyes, and then said, "I honestly don't know."  
  
"How did you come back, and why so late? Why weren't you back right after you disappeared? Why let Harry think you were dead for so long? Do you know what it did to him?" Lupin was flabbergasted, and couldn't believe the behavior of his friend.  
  
"I don't know why. It just seemed like I was sleeping a long, dreamless sleep. I remember dueling with Bellatrix, and then her spell hitting me. Then, after seemingly sleeping for a while, I saw someone pulling me toward a light. Bringing me back from wherever I was."  
  
"And who was this person."  
  
"You'll never believe it. Severus Snape."  
  
"Snape? But why? And when?"  
  
"He had seen me falling through the veil in Harry's memories, and remembered something he had heard a long time ago. He knew how bad Harry was taking the loss, and decided to try and bring me back. He only rescued me from behind the veil two days before Harry was kidnapped. Until then, I was recuperating at a secret location."  
  
"I still can't believe that Snape saved you from wherever you were."  
  
"Neither can I, I don't think he does either. And it surprises me that he cares anything for Harry's well-being."  
  
"I am not completely heartless," came a smooth voice from the doorway. Lupin and Sirius started. "And I'm almost done with the potion he needs. Give it another thirty minutes or so."  
  
"Thirty minutes? That was quick." Lupin said in amazement.  
  
"It doesn't take long. It is relatively easy to brew. The hardest part is finding the herb."  
  
As they spoke Harry began gasping for breath. "Harry!?!" Sirius exclaimed madly, trying to help his godson. "Breathe, Harry. Please, breathe." The boy didn't respond. His eyes were open, and his eyes looked wildly into nothing, almost glazed over with a white film that prevented him from seeing. Slowly, his breaths steadied, although Sirius didn't relax. He smoothed the boy's hair over his sweating brow. "Please hurry and finish that potion, Severus," Sirius said without looking at the Potions master. But Snape didn't need to be told. He was already gone.

* * *

A/n: Sorry its short. Please R/r. 


	23. Chapter 23: Waking Up

Disclaimer: None of the following belongs to me.

Hi again. Sorry I am not updating too quickly. I don't have much time to write anymore. But I will try to get chapters out ASAP. I really enjoy writing them. Sorry, but I wanted to get this out soon, so lovablechick213 didn't beta this one.

To my reviewers/readers:

Makalani Astral: always glad to hear from you. Here's more.

Elanore de Lioncourt- so glad that you like my story, and glad that you like the fact that Sirius is back. Thanks for reviewing. (and where does your penname come from? De Lioncourt sounds like I've read it somewhere before.)

Fanes- glad you took the time to read my story. Sorry to keep you waiting for so long.

Volleypickle- glad that you enjoyed it.

Confused- you hit the nail on the head. I come up with the story as I go along, so I don't know what is going to happen, just like you. And I think I know which story it was that you were trying to read, because the same thing happened to me and I was so disappointed.

Wwwendy- so glad that you enjoyed it. Don't worry about being too demanding. It keeps me updating as quickly as I do.

Lady Lily 3- Your questions will eventually be answered.

Vaughn and

Kears- don't worry, I won't let you fall.

Lady Zee- sorry it was short. But thanks for reviewing.

Insanechildfic- glad that you liked it. Thanks for reviewing.

Hoofstails Gal- so happy that you REALLY enjoy it. I'm trying my best to keep it updated.

TigerLily Padfoot- thanks for the compliment, although a great thanks is owed to lovablechick213, my beta reader.

And now, here is another chapter

Chapter 23: Waking up

Snape held Harry's mouth open, and practically forced the potion down his throat. The boy unwillingly swallowed, even though he was unconscious. The three grown men looked down at the sleeping boy, still worried that he may never fully recover. "Thank you, Severus," Sirius said quietly. He looked extremely tired, as his sleep hadn't really been restful since his return from behind the veil. Lupin was worried that he should get some rest, but said nothing, knowing that Sirius would stay with Harry no matter what.

"Albus is stopping by later to check on Harry," Lupin said in a conversational manner. "He says that he also wishes to speak with you about what happened in June." (A/n: It was June, right?)

"Alright. Even though there is nothing much more to tell."

"Still, I am sure he would like to hear your account of what you can remember."

"I don't remember much," Sirius said, looking directly into his friend's eyes. "It was like a dark dream. I seem to remember being warm, though, and happy. Like I didn't want to wake up, and like I hadn't a care in the world. It was the most peaceful feeling I have ever had."

"But that is all? Nothing more than just being in a sleep-like state?"

Sirius nodded in response. "That's all."

"How did Snape rescue save you? How did he know that you were still alive?"

"I'm not sure yet, I'm afraid. That is a story that he will have to tell both of us. Although, he said that when he was in Hogwarts, he studied deeply into the Department of Mysteries and what lay in there. His uncle worked in there, did you know?"

"Had no idea. But you don't even know how he saved your life?"

"I will tell him when I have the time," came the smooth voice of the Potions professor from the doorway.

Lupin spun around in his chair. "Would you PLEASE stop doing that?"

"Can't help it," Snape responded in an amused voice, like it was amusing to see how rattled he could get Remus.

"Well, do you have the time now to explain?" Sirius asked.

"I suppose. The potions I am making have to brew for a few hours before I can do anything more with them."

Sirius motioned for Snape to take the remaining chair in the room, while he and Lupin sat straighter in the chairs, prepared to listen. Snape looked at the chair as though considering whether or not to sit down. He decided to, though, and sat in the chair, preparing himself to speak. "I did study the Department of Mysteries in my last two years at Hogwarts. My uncle, drinking one night at our house, started telling my family about the wondrous things that were held there. It intrigued me to learn more, and I set out to research what he had left untold. My studies did not reveal much, of course, or then it would not have been a mystery what lay there. So, knowing how easily my uncle could be manipulated when drunk, I went visiting his house one day right after I had graduated from school. He welcomed me in, and decided that we could have a nice drink to celebrate my graduation. I barely drank anything, but by the end of the second hour of my visit, he was wasted on Fire whiskey. So I asked him about the department of mysteries, and he unknowingly told me more than I ever could have hoped to know. One of the things he told me about was a mysterious Veil, that had wondrous powers. These powers, he said, were the ability to restore life to the dead. It is a gateway between death and life, although you do not die by falling through it. When someone says that the dead can hear the living, it is because of the veil. The veil is the way that the dead can communicate with the living. Because the spell did not kill Black, it merely held him there. It would have held him there for eternity, or however long it would have taken someone to realize a person was in there."

"And how did you get me out?" Sirius asked.

"There are words you speak. 'Mortis libero hoc victus animus. Hoc secus paratus.'" (A/n: forgive my Latin)

"And that is how you freed him?" Lupin asked in awe.

"Yes. Although he was very weak, and seemingly did not want to leave where he was, he was alive and healthy. If not for the veil, than he would be dead now."

"I can't believe it. I can't believe that you actually saved his life."

"Believe it. I knew that he meant a lot to the boy, and that he does have a part to play yet in the war and battles to come."

"Who told you that?"

"Trelawney, if you must know."

"Trewlaney?" Sirius asked. "You actually believed that fruitcake?"

"She is known to be right a couple of times. This is one of those times." As the three spoke, Harry moaned from his bed. Their attention was all turned toward him.

"Harry?" Sirius whispered. "Harry? Can you hear me?" He received no verbal answer. Sirius picked up his godson's hand. "Harry, if you can hear my, squeeze my hand." Very lightly, Harry squeezed his hand in response. Sirius almost laughed in relief. Extremely slowly, Harry opened his eyes and turned toward Sirius.

"Sirius?" he asked in quiet amazement. "Is that really you?'

"It's really me, Harry," Sirius responded. "I'm here, and I won't leave you."

"I thought you were dead. I thought you were gone, and it was all my fault."

"I'm alive. And I am going to stay right here with you until you are better." Harry smiled very slightly at the statement, then drifted back to sleep. "And afterwards, I'm going to track down every one of those death eaters and kill them myself," he said quietly, turning away from the boy.

"You cant do that alone," Snape stated. "A time will come that you can get them back, but not right now. Now is not the time to go and attack them. Anger is the worst incentive to attack. People do stupid things when they are angry."

"Besides," Lupin said, "I would like a shot at some of them myself."

"As long as I get Malfoy," Sirius sneered, reminding Snape very much of himself. Molly Weasley knocked on the door just then. "Dumbledore would like to speak to Black and Snape," she said.

"We'll be right there," Sirius said. And laying Harry's hand back on the sheets, he followed Snape into the kitchen, leaving Lupin to watch over the young boy.

A day later, Harry woke up again, this time with only Sirius in the room. "Sirius?" He asked quietly.

"I'm here," Sirius answered. "What is it, son?"

"It hurts," the boy said.

"Where?"

"Everywhere."

"Just wait a little longer, and Snape will bring you another potion, alright?"

Harry nodded. "What happened?"

Sirius looked confused. "Don't you remember?" Harry shook his head as much as he could. "What do you remember?"

"I remember the portkey, at the bookstore. It took me to this field. And I remember the potions, the torture. I remember everything going black, and it feeling like I couldn't breathe. But that's all. I don't know how I got here, or how I escaped."

"I'll tell you when you're well enough," Sirius said, with a sad smile. "Until then, there are people who will be very interested to here that you are awake. I'll go get them."

* * *

A/n: short, so short. So sorry. Didn't have much time to write, but I wouldn't to keep you updated. Please r/r. I may not update for a while. My Grandma just died, so please forgive me. 


	24. Chapter 24: Order of the Phoenix Meeting

Disclaimer: I own nothing. It all belongs to J.K. Rowling

Hey guys. Sorry it has taken so long for me to get back to my story. Thanks to everyone who reviewed, and I appreciated the condolences for my grandma's death. Well, there is a hurricane raging in my state, so I figured: "Why not type more on my story?" So here it goes anyway.

I'm not going to write a note to all of my reviewers, but here:

ParanoiaIn2005- you had a really good point about everyone acting too normal. If I ever revise this story, I'll remember that.

Elanore de Lioncourt- I should have remembered that, I just finished reading "Interview with the Vampire". Very good, although quite strange, too. So sorry about your aunt and granddad.

Ahmad53832- thanks for reviewing. I'll read your stories when I get the chance. I myself am sixteen, and in the middle of writing a novel. (Fanfiction is what I do to get my mind off of the other story for a while). Thanks for pointing out the detail in chapter 21, I completely overlooked it. Sorry about that, and I'll try not to let it happen again.

To all of you:

Glad a lot of you liked how I brought Sirius back from the veil. I thought it might add something to the plot to do that. And thanks again for your sympathy that was expressed.

So, here goes Chapter 24. Please R/r afterwards.

Chapter 24: Order of the Phoenix Meeting

Snape came in first, to look at Harry. Harry was still half-asleep, but he was awake enough to be examined. "I think you'll recover eventually," he finally reported.

"Eventually?" Sirius questioned. "What makes you say eventually?"

"The fact that I don't know exactly."

"Snape?" Harry whispered. "Can I see everyone else now?"

"I don't see why not. Just not for long. You don't want to become too exhausted." With a swirl of his robes, Snape disappeared out of the doorway to fetch Ron and Hermione. They practically came running in. Sirius had just had time to help Harry sit up in his bed.

"Oh, Harry!" Hermione cried, throwing her arms around his neck and sobbing hysterically. Snape cleared his throat dramatically from the doorway. "Oh, I'm sorry," she said, letting go of his neck and sitting up. "I forgot..."

"It's alright," Harry smiled weakly, his voice still raspy. "I don't mind."

"How are ya doing, mate?" Ron asked cautiously.

"Not as bad as I could be," Harry replied.

"Your optimism is sickening, Mr. Potter," Snape said. "You can say if you don't feel well. You don't have to play the hero all of the time."

"Okay then. I feel like someone took me and ran me over with the Hogwarts' Express," he said, in a half-sarcastic voice, although one that sounded honest.

"I'm so sorry, Harry," Sirius muttered. "I should have been there. It was partially my fault. It's my job to look after you and make sure that nothing happens to you."

Harry was about to argue with Sirius, when Snape spoke. "I believe that the blame lies fully with me," he said smoothly. "You see, I should have kept a sharper eye out for Mr. Potter, and I didn't. I could have rescued him sooner than I did, or in an easier way, but I didn't. So, if he is in any pain, than the blame should be put on me."

Ron and Hermione both gaped, not ever hearing anything like this from their Potion's master in all the years of them going to Hogwarts. "I still want to know what happened," Harry said. "I want to hear what happened after I blacked out at the field."

"There isn't much to tell," Snape said.

"But how did you get me out of there? The wards would not have allowed me to leave had I been alive. But here I am, alive. How did you do it?"

"You could say that you did die, actually. At least, you stopped breathing. That way, I could slip you past the wards. It was a potion that I gave you; the last one before you blacked out. When I had you safely away from the field, I brought you back in good enough time. That's all there is to it."

"I died?" Harry gasped.

"Technically, I suppose. But you are alive now, so that is all that matters for now."

"Thank you," Harry said, meaning it with his whole heart. "Thank you for saving me again."

"You are welcome," Snape returned. And then he gave Harry the closest thing to a genuine smile that he had ever seen. It was amazing, and Harry almost died of shock on the spot. No one else noticed, though, and they continued talking.

"Can you tell me what happened to you?" Harry asked of Sirius. "What really happened after you fell through the veil?"

Sirius sighed. "Wouldn't you rather rest, and have me tell you later?"

"No. The suspense is killing me." Hermione gasped. "Sorry. I mean, I'm really interested to hear what happened."

So Sirius began once again telling the story of what happened at the Department of Mysteries, and how he was still alive. "So Luna was wrong," Harry whispered.

"Well there's a shocker for you," Ron said. "Really, Harry, do you believe anything that girl says?"

"I'm not sure. She was right about the thestrals."

"Well, obviously the veil isn't the place where the dead go."

"On the contrary, Ron," Sirius began. "Your friend Luna was correct. That is where the dead go. But it is also where the near-dead can be healed again. Like me. If I had of been dead when I fell through the veil, than dead I would have stayed. But since I was still alive, the veil kept me alive, and healed me."

"You're bloody kidding me!" Ron almost shouted.

Sirius laughed. "No, I'm not." At that moment, Madame Pomfrey bustled in. "Everyone out," she ordered. "He needs rest."

"Well, see you later Harry," Ron said. Hermione nodded, still too close to tears to really say anything. They left the room together.

"Well, aren't the two of you going to leave?" Madame Pomfrey challenged.

"Not planning to, no," Sirius responded. Harry almost laughed at someone daring to contradict Madame Pomfrey.

"And I am staying as well," Snape said in his 'I-don't-want-to-hear-another-word-about-it' voice.

"Very well," Pomfrey sniffed. She went about preparing to examine the boy.

"You don't need to do that," Snape said. "I already examined him."

"I'm the medi-witch around here, so if I wish to give him an exam, I will do so."

Sirius grinned behind the witch's back. Clearly the woman felt territorial over her patients. Harry sighed, clearly not wanting to go through this again, but didn't say a word as Madame Pomfrey examined him yet again.

* * *

"We caught Lucius Malfoy," Dumbledore told the Order members that evening at their meeting. "He is being held at a Hogwarts dungeon, until a more secure place can be found. Until then, his cell will be suffice. He can't escape, I have made sure of that. Azkaban prison is suddenly too easy to escape from, as was already proven earlier."

"And just what are you planning to do with Malfoy?" Sirius snarled. "I have a few suggestions."

"He will go on trial, as soon as a new Minister of Magic is elected. Until then, he will remain a prisoner of war."

"It's too good for him," Lupin shot out. "He showed no fairness to Harry. I feel we should treat him the same way. I think we should kill him right now, without a trial."

"Remus, please. I expected you to help me keep the peace. Now, moving on to other news, Mundungus (a/n: spelling?) had heard things from the underground again. Care to share?"

"Of course, Dumbledore," Fletcher responded, standing up. He was actually sober tonight. "Well, I heard that the Death Eater's are planning to attack a muggle village outside of London in about a week. Not really sure about that one though. And there is a price on Snape's head. One million galleons to the first person who can bring him in, dead or alive. Preferably alive; they want to torture him first."

"Thank you for being so blunt," Snape said in an emotionless voice.

"My pleasure," Fletcher said, sitting back down.

"Have you been drinking again, Mundungus?" McGonagall questioned in a stern voice.

"Only a lil'," he responded. "Not as much as usual, tho'."

"Next," Dumbledore interrupted. "We have two new members to induct into the Order." He nodded to the two sitting in the back of the room. They stood up. "You must now take the solemn oath. Repeat after me: We, Fred and George Weasley, do solemnly swear to uphold justice, do what is right, and always fight against darkness and evil." (A/n: Sorry, not too original.)

The twins repeated the oath, more solemnly than anyone had ever seen them for a long amount of time. There was no laughter or smile in their voices or eyes, but the utmost sincerity in what they were saying.

Later, Minerva questioned Mrs. Weasley as to why the boy's were so serious. "Didn't you hear?" she asked. Minerva shook her head. "Well, they were dating two girls; twin girls actually. Camille and Catherine Keaton. They died recently. The death eaters decided it would be fun to kill them. It was their way of hurting our family, since they so obviously sided with Dumbledore, and are so called 'Muggle Lovers'."

"No," McGonagall gasped. "You can't be serious."

"But I am," Mrs. Weasley said sadly. "The boys were both broken hearted. I have never seen them so angry and sad at the same time. I never thought I would want my old boys back so much." She wiped her hand across her eyes. "They were such nice girls. American, and very nice. The boy's were in love like I had never seen them. I only hope now that they don't do anything too rash and get themselves killed. I don't know what I would do if any one of my boys, or my daughter, got killed. It would probably kill me." She began to sob quietly.

"The Order will look after you and your family," Minerva comforted her. "Your boys are safe with us. Trust me. I'm sure even Trelawney can see that."

Molly Weasley smiled a bit. "Thank you Minerva," she said. "I suppose I am just a bit tired is all. I was so worried about Harry. He's like a son to me, you know. I love him like a son. And I think I am about the closest thing to a mother that he's ever had. I can't believe that a single boy can go through so much in such a short lifetime."

"Nor can I," Minerva agreed. "Nor can I."

* * *

A/n: Hope you enjoyed. Please R/r. (Guess what? I'm learning Latin. So maybe I can improve that in some of my stories.)


	25. Chapter 25: Speaking with Dumbledore

Disclaimer: You know the deal: None of it is mine.

So, here we are again, at the beginning of another chapter. I enjoyed all of the feedback from the last chapter. (I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!) I am so glad that you all like my story! Indiegurl2008 is going to be beta reading my stories again, so they shouldn't have so many mistakes anymore (sorry about that).

I have no idea why I did that to Fred and George (dramatic effect really). But I couldn't resist putting a price on Sev's head. (Hehehe!) Sorry it is taking so long to update, but I'm back in school now, so I have loads of homework.

And if any of you want to talk to me on yahoo messenger, the address in on my author info. page It was created especially for you all. Feel free to use it; I really look forward to talking to you all.

To my wonderful reviewers:

The-Bass-Player312- That hurricane was a big washout. It didn't even rain here, can you believe it? It burned out mostly in Florida. Glad that you liked the story. Hope you don't like Fred and George too much. (Even though I do). Go figure. Try and guess to what that means.

Pure Black- Thank you for the wonderful assessment Mr. Black (guess where I got that from).

Shelly101- glad that you liked it. Here's more.

Texasjeanette- glad that you liked it so much.

Lady Lily 3- Here's more. I've been trying to make longer chapters. (In fact, I think that the last one was my longest one yet). Not sure though. I'll have to check on that.

Awen- Thank for the compliment. It's not going to end yet.

Indiegurl2000- you changed your name, didn't recognize it at first. I'll be sure to send you more of my story so you can check it for errors. Thanks so much.

Lady Zee- thanks. I will

Marauders Lover- glad that you like it so far.

Volleypickle16- thanks for another positive review.

Lyss33- so glad that you enjoyed it. Glad that you liked that I brought Sirius back, too.

ParanoiaIn2005- don't worry about the rambling (I tend to do that too). Thanks for the fun review, and the condolences.

And to anyone who didn't review: Thanks for reading this story. And even if you may have some critical words to say, feel free. Just don't be mean about it please!

Chapter 25: Speaking with Dumbledore

Harry was awake when the Headmaster came in the next morning. The rest of the house was still asleep, with Sirius still by his bedside. Harry didn't even notice that anyone had entered the room until he heard Sirius being shaken awake. He looked over and saw the kindly old headmaster, telling Sirius that he would like a word with Harry, privately. Sirius was too tired to protest, and got up and slowly made his way to his own room.

"Hello, Professor Dumbledore," Harry whispered hoarsely from his bed.

"Hello, Harry. Glad to see you are actually awake this time." Dumbledore sat down in the now unoccupied chair by Harry's bed. Harry struggled to sit upright in the bed, and the headmaster grabbed him gently around the shoulders, and helped him up.

"What did you want to talk to me about, Professor Dumbledore?"

"I felt it was time for another talk, Harry. You do not know how relieved I am to see you alive and recuperating. We caught Lucius Malfoy, if you are interested in knowing."

"Really? I'm glad. Too bad the dementors won't suck him dry of his soul."

"Harry, do you really think anyone deserves such a fate?"

"He does. While I was sleeping these past few days, I've had visions of what has happened at Death Eater meeting. It's terrible. He has no consideration for human life. To him, it's all a game. He doesn't deserve to live."

"Can we really decide that?" Dumbledore asked. "Is it our place? Maybe there is a higher power that judges these situations, and we should let the deciding be to that force."

"Or maybe we should take care of it ourselves, and finish him off. He'll only escape again, and then kill more people; more muggles who can't fight back, and those fighting against Voldemort."

"I know. We will decide what we will do to him at his trial."

"Fudge isn't still in charge, is he?"

"No, he's not. A new minister is going to be elected soon. Malfoy will be tried as soon as the minister is elected."

"I hope that this one has more common sense than Fudge."

"I am most certain they will be," Dumbledore said, a shimmer of a twinkle in his eyes, which had up until that minute been tired and sad.

"You know who will be elected, don't you?" Harry questioned anxiously. "Who is it?"

"I know who is running for the office, and I have every confidence in them that they will get elected. Until then, that is all I will say." But Dumbledore had a slight grin on his face. He would not change his mind, though; he would not tell Harry anything more of that subject.

"So, how are you feeling?" Dumbledore asked, changing the subject.

"Just peachy," Harry replied sarcastically. "Seriously, I feel better than I did yesterday."

"That's good. I'm very relieved. And how did you and Professor Snape manage during the time I left the two of you together? Was it truly as bad as you thought?"

"No, I suppose it wasn't."

"That's good. You must realize, Harry, that I would do nothing to intentionally harm you. That is another thing I would like to discuss with you. I am truly sorry for leaving you with the Dursleys all these years. I truly never knew."

"That is partially my fault. I never told."

"I should have kept a better eye on you and your household. If I had of, you never would have gone through years of toil at their hands." A tear formed in his eye.

"It's not as bad as you think it was. I survived. I'm stronger because of it." Dumbledore and Harry fell into silence for a while. "No one told me that Professor Snape was ever married," Harry commented.

"That's because no one really knows," Dumbledore said softly. "He lived in Dublin at the time that happened, and didn't tell anyone when he got married. I only learned about it when he visited England for a few days not long before she died. Have you seen her picture? She really was a lovely girl, very sweet too. I met her once."

"Why didn't he tell anyone?"

"He thought no one would care. At school, he hadn't been popular, and his family didn't really care about him. So, they had a small wedding and invited only her family and a few close friends of theirs. When she died, he turned to me to help him get his vengeance. I told him he could become a spy, since most of his old friends from school had become Death Eaters, and it would seem very likely that he would be one also. He agreed very willingly. At first, I think he wished that he would get caught and killed just so he could be with her once more. Eventually, though, he learned how much he was helping us by just being there at most of the meetings."

"Is that why he always acts as he does? Because the one person he really loved died?"

"Partially, He also has to distance himself because of his spy status. Well, at least he did."

"How did Voldemort react to my getting away again?"

Dumbledore looked at him very seriously. "He is very angry. Angry especially that Severus outsmarted him, and that he relied so heavily on our spy. He placed very high prices on both of your heads."

"Really? How much am I worth?"

"A few million galleons."

"Wow. Don't I feel special?"

Dumbledore smiled slightly. "Madame Pomfrey thinks you'll be up and around in a little over a week. Rest and I'll be back in to talk to you any time I can, and that you want me around." 

"You're always welcome to come."

Dumbledore rose and left, leaving Harry temporarily alone. Harry felt tired, and weak, although he wouldn't admit it to anyone. He stood up on shaky legs, and leaned on the windowsill. The sun felt so good on his face. He couldn't help but pull the window open just a crack, and feel the breeze on his face. He looked down at his arms and saw how pale he had become because of his illness. He would need to work on a tan.

Being in bed was driving him crazy. 'I'll prove to them I am not as sick as they think,' he thought. He took two steps away from the window, and the world swam. He reached out for support, but found nothing. His breathing became more labored, and he couldn't seem to get the oxygen there quickly enough. His heart sped up, trying to get the oxygen to where it needed to be in his body. He felt a copper tasting liquid make its way into his throat, and realized it was blood. Darkness clouded his vision, and he fell into the darkness.

Downstairs, Snape heard a thud. Not telling anyone else, he ran upstairs and opened the door. Harry was lying unconscious on the wooden floor, blood leaking from his mouth. Snape rushed downstairs and got help, not knowing if it would be too late.

* * *

A/n: Sorry it is so short. I don't know what else to put in this particular chapter. Sorry it is taking so long to update, but I don't have much time lately. Please r/r.


	26. Chapter 26 Redone

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

So, I decided, hopefully to the satisfaction of you all, to redo a bit of it. Read it, and you will find a new minister of magic, who I think would please at least one of my readers more. Small detail changes, but that's about it.

Thanks to indiegurl2008, who is my beta reader. She will read this chapter this time, and I am sure it will be much better. (Can't do it without you, indiegurl!)

Enjoy. And please tell me how much better or worse this one is than the last chapter 26

Chapter 26: Ministry Elections and Celebrations (Redone)

Harry was being watched over again night and day. No one had ever seen Severus Snape more watchful and concerned for a student before. It was almost like watching a father and son. Almost. Snape would not admit to anyone that he felt compassion and pity for the poor boy.

Harry woke up the next afternoon to loud noises from downstairs. No one was in his room at the time, so, acting simply as he normally would, he reached over to the table beside his bed, and put on his glasses. He stood up, more slowly this time. He felt the strength return to his body as soon as his feet touched the ground. He trudged slowly to the end of his bed and pulled on a shirt and a pair of pants. He made his way slowly down to the stairs, where he saw a tall red-haired young man getting hugged dramatically by his beaming mother. It was Kingsley Shacklebolt, in the midst of the celebration. "I can't believe it," people kept saying, congratulating and shaking his hand.

Harry decided not to interrupt the happy party with his entrance. He saw Sirius and Remus congratulating Shacklebolt for whatever it was that he had been awarded. Silently, he made his way upstairs unnoticed. Well, at least he thought unnoticed. As he closed the door to his room, someone knocked silently and pushed it open.

"Feeling better?" Came the silky voice of Professor Snape.

Harry nodded. "Much."

"Why did you leave? Didn't you want to congratulate Mr. Shacklebolt?"

"I didn't want to interrupt. It's his special time; I would have been a distraction."

"Do you always have such a negative image of yourself?"

"Not always." Harry paused. "Isn't it odd all that has happened in the past few weeks?"

"It is," Snape agreed.

"In the past year or so, I've really learned how much can happen in just a short matter of time. It's odd really. Most people don't really consider it."

"You're strange, Mr. Potter."

"Thank you," Harry said smiling faintly. "Of course, I could say the same thing about you. And one more thing though: Could you stop calling me 'Mr. Potter' when we're not in school? It's just Harry. That whole Mr. Potter thing is really starting to annoy me."

"Out of school," Snape agreed. "You are still Mr. Potter in class, though."

"Agreed. Are you going to start being more civil to me in class?"

"Not entirely. You're still cocky and arrogant. I won't be as cruel, but I won't baby you either."

"That's fine." Snape looked at him in surprise. "I don't like people giving me special treatment. It gets annoying. You're actually the one teacher who treated me almost like everyone else. I have always appreciated that, even if I didn't admit it to anyone, including myself."

"That's interesting," Snape muttered. "Well, the excitement should have died down by now. Why don't you go down and socialize for a while?"

Harry nodded. "I think I will. Thank you, Professor. For everything, I mean. You've saved me more times than anyone else. I'm indebted to you, you know."

"Oh trust me, you'll pay me back one day." Harry smiled, and then left the room. Snape could hear the excitement from the bedroom, as Harry was welcomed back by all of his friends.

There was a big celebration that night. For one reason, to celebrate Harry's near recovery, (He still had to be careful not to overextend himself.) Another reason was to celebrate Shacklebolt's ministry success. Everybody from the Order was there. Everybody, including Fred and George. They grinned a couple times at jokes made, but they pulled none of their usual pranks. It was sad to see them so depressed and not like their usual selves. Even their mother wished them back to their old ways.

Harry stayed away from mostly everyone except for Ron and Hermione, Sirius and Lupin. They chatted happily nearly all evening. Sirius and Harry talking about plans they would make once Shacklebolt cleared Sirius's name, and Lupin saying how he hoped they wouldn't be up to too much mischief. Harry and Sirius winked behind Remus's back.

Snape stayed in a corner away from the festivities. He was not in a festive mood in the least, and wanted mostly to get away from everyone, although Dumbledore always drug him back when he tried to escape. He noticed when Fred and George left the room, and took the initiative to follow.

They were sitting in the study, not talking, just seeming to be reflecting. Snape approached them cautiously. "Misters Weasley," he acknowledged carefully.

"The bat followed." Fred or George commented.

"I'm not in a partying mood either," Snape commented. "I just decided to come in here for a while."

"You mean to check on us," one said.

"He's getting as bad as our mother," the other one commented.

"Why don't you just go away, Snape. We're not in a socializing mood."

"I agree, George."

"I wasn't going to socialize. I merely wanted to talk to you about what happened."

"We know already what happened, as does everyone else by now" Fred commented. "So, what's to talk about?"

"The fact that I know what you're going through right now."

"You? How would you know anything?" George asked incredulously.

"I was in love once, believe it or not."

"You?!" Fred exclaimed. "You must be joking!"

Snape chose to ignore the tone. "I'm not joking. I was once married and once going to be a father, but that changed. She was stolen from me, and she never had the chance to defend herself, and I wasn't there to protect her."

"Unbelievable," they muttered in unison.

"Most people would say that. But let me tell you something. It does no good to anyone to dwell on it, least of all yourselves. You two are the clowns of the group; the ones everyone expects to brighten the worst days. If you lose your personality, you may just end up like me."

"Now there's a depressing thought," George said, eyes widened.

Snape glared. "All I'm saying is, I become so overcome in grief and despair that I forgot what it was like to be happy. It is really terrible to end up like that. Not that I have ever enjoyed the two of you and your sense of humor, but nearly everyone else does."

"Never thought of that," Fred muttered.

"Of course you didn't. The two of you never really think." With that, Snape turned, and went to his room, leaving a confused set of twins behind him.

"The oddest thing just happened," Fred muttered to Harry when they were able to speak without anyone else listening. "Snape just gave us a pep talk. Can you believe it?"

"A while ago, maybe not. But now I can."

"Mate, it was the strangest thing," George said. "Even if he did make sense." Harry grinned slightly.

Everyone noticed that night that Fred and George's personality changed almost entirely. Harry couldn't help but smile at Snape when he reentered the room later. Snape didn't acknowledge the smile, but he couldn't help but notice the relief on Harry's face. The only bad thing was when they placed and Exploding Egg in the punch bowl before the end of the festivities, but Dumbledore smiled, and everyone else was too glad to see Fred and George happy then to scold them.

&

A/n: Sorry it's short. Tried to get it out soon. Please r/r.


	27. Chapter 27: The End of Summer

Disclaimer: As always, I don't own a thing

This chapter will be short, to see if anyone wants it back. Tell me what you want and I'm here to serve.

A/n: Umm, Bill's still the minister, by the way. Sorry, I just like Bill.

Chapter 27: The End of Summer

For what was left of summer vacation, Harry, Sirius, and Snape were confined indoors; too many people wanted the bounties that had been placed on both of their heads. Sirius tried to keep Harry entertained with tales of the Marauders, but Molly Weasley often gave him a disapproving look as though he may give Harry an idea. Harry enjoyed the stories, but didn't argue with Mrs. Weasley; He knew better than to do that.

Snape dwelled most of the time in the basement of the house, looking at books as though he might learn something from them. The sad fact was, he could have taught the authors of many of the books a thing or two. It was a relief, almost, when he could leave the house and seclusion to go teach again, even if he did loathe the job sometimes. His faithful Slytherins would more than likely be out for blood and a bounty this year. He knew that they wouldn't attack him face-to-face, but Slytherins were not always known for an honorable nature, so we would have to be exceptionally careful when watching his back this year.

No one really saw Snape after the party for Bill. And even though he had saved Harry's life and was now a more likeable character, Ron and Hermione still tried to steer clear if they saw him. Harry felt a sort of mutual respect for his Potions master, even though he had no urge to converse with the man. Whether he liked him or not, Snape was a hard person to talk to. Even Fred and George showed less contempt toward him, which was utterly amazing considering the vendetta they had declared against the potions master years before. No one knew what Snape had said to the Weasley twins to get their attitudes to change, but it had worked.

Snape left a few days before term started, and only Harry was up when he left. Harry hadn't slept well since his capture, so he often awoke early in the morning and went on downstairs. He sat in the dark shadows cast by the house in the early hours before the dawn broke over the neighborhood. At first, Snape seemed not to notice him, for nothing was said from either of them. Finally, the voice from the other side of the room spoke:

"Why are you up so early? Shouldn't you be resting?"

Even though his face was obscured in the dark shadows of the room, Harry hid the surprise on his face to the best of his ability. "I'm not tired, really. I don't get very tired lately."

Snape's head turned in his direction, and Harry knew he was being studied. The man's black eyes were accustomed to focusing in the dark, almost like a vampire can spot his victim without the aid of the light. "Do you need a sleeping potion before I leave?"

"No, I'll be fine. I'm not tired, honestly," Harry insisted, trying to make his voice sound as chipper as at all possible.

"Are you aware of what happens to the body when it does not get enough sleep?" Snape asked with the same voce he used during so many lessons to question his pupils. It was not one of absolute ridicule, but one that plainly declared that Harry should know the answer.

"I've heard. But really, I get at least four or five hours a day. Besides, it seems that you don't sleep much more than me."

"That's different. I'm older and need less sleep. You're still young and growing." Snape's voice showed less of the certainty it had.

"I'm fine!" Harry insisted, and Snape did not press the conversation any more. Harry wanted to break the uncomfortable silence that had fallen over the room, so after racking his brains, said something he had been wondering for a while. "What do you think will happen in your house this year? Will anyone try to attack you, do you think?"

Snape's reply did not come right away, as though he had often thought of the question many times himself. "I think you need to be more concerned for your own well-being at the present. The Slytherins won't be at a pleased that you escaped yet again, and their parents will more than likely be stressing the need to get rid of you."

"Yeah well, I didn't betray Voldemort like you did."

"Don't say his name," Snape hissed, although there was far less venom in his voice than as was normal for the Potions master. "Anyway, they would be stupid to try anything against me. I'll be vigilant, as always. I'm accustomed to watching my back for people trying to attack. You, on the other hand, have always had people ready to defend you; you need to learn to take care of yourself."

"I know how to throw spells," Harry retorted indignantly.

Snape sighed as though the conversation were starting to annoy him. "No, I mean to watch your back. To feel people's eyes upon you before they strike. You may think I sound like Moody, but you will need to be ever-vigilant."

"Oh," Harry said. "Well, I kind of figured that anyway."

"Good. Then you didn't need me to tell you," Snape smirked. They both knew he did. Harry may have been a good student when it came to Defense Against the Dark Arts, but he wasn't really too good when it came to watching his own back; He still had a lot to learn.

"Do you think…"Harry's voice trailed off. More light seeped in through the window.

"What, Potter?" Snape asked.

"Do you think that you could teach me awareness? On top of Occlumency, I mean? I know that that's asking a lot, but if anyone knows about defense from unsuspecting attacks it should be you, right?"

Snape studied Harry once more, unsure if he was completely sincere. "I suppose it wouldn't hurt," Snape said slowly. "You must be willing to practice, though."

"I will be."

"Than yes, I will teach you. The first week of school, come and see me that Wednesday, and we will begin."

Snape opened the door in the living room carefully, trying not to disturb Mrs. Black's portrait. It was the first time Snape had been in the sun since he had returned from Voldemort's clutches. It was refreshing, even for someone who normally liked dark enclosed spaces. He stepped into the breaking daylight- - and that was the last Harry saw of him until the welcoming feast at Hogwarts.

A/n: Like I said: short. Just to build interest if you like the idea of me coming back with this story. Please r/r!


	28. Chapter 28: Hogwarts: A Horror

Disclaimer: As always, I own nothing

A/n: Aw heck, why not? I figured it wouldn't kill me to write a few more chapters of this story being as so many people have asked that I continue. Life kind of stopped me for a while (over a year I know, I'm sorry). Thank you to those who have been loyal to my story and begged for me to continue writing. It is to you I dedicate this next chapter.

Oh yeah, and I guess this story is AU now that the series is over. Hehe

Chapter 28: Hogwarts: A Horror (Part I)

"Forget ridin' the Hogwart's Express," Mad-Eye said the day Harry was supposed to leave for school. Sirius had left to take care of some issues with Dumbledore, and would see Harry when he arrived at Hogwarts. "We've set up a port key to teleport you from here straight to the Gryffindor Tower."

Harry looked at his two friends in regret. They had to change their whole lives because of being his companions. They only smiled back though, with no looks of remorse or anger at having been his acquaintance. A couple of days ago, Harry had even suggested that Hermione and Ron stop being his friends, to which Hermione only said, "Honestly, Harry! It's wonderful to be a friend of yours. An honor even. We wouldn't abandon you just so we can have more comfortable lives."

"Yeah, mate," Ron chimed in. "We're with you until the end. Until that sod is gone, and even after that, we'll always be here for you."

Harry had blushed but said "Thank you." Who could truly ask for more loyal friends?

Back in the present, Mad Eye cleared his throat and spoke more quietly and more severely. "Now, I don't think I have to tell the three of you how important vigilance is! Remember, the children of death eaters are attending school with you! Some of them would like nothing more than to hand you over to Voldemort, others would like a shot at you themselves. Don't ever let your guards down! Not even in Gryffindor Tower, where you probably always felt safe. The enemy can be anywhere, or have anyone under their control! Never forget that! Especially you, Harry! Constant vigilance!"

Harry nodded firmly. "Constant vigilance," he repeated quietly.

"Now," Molly Weasley said, entering from the kitchen, "each of you has a separate portkey, and someone is going with each of you, and then returning back after you are safely in the Gryffindor Commons. Hermione, you'll be with me, Ron with Mad Eye, and Harry with Kingsley."

"Are we ready?" Molly asked into the next room. Arthur and Kingsley appeared and stood beside their charges.

"Alright then," Ron said. "Who's off first?"

"We are," Mad Eye said. "We're the ones who make sure it's safe for everyone else. Want to make sure there are no dangers."

"Oh great," Ron whispered.

"Ginny will be leaving about two hours after you," Arthur said. "We're missing one of her books and she's gone to get it right now."

"Be safe, Arthur," Molly commanded.

Ron grabbed his trunk firmly with one hand, and Mad Eye held out the port key to him. Ron grasped the side of the dingy tennis shoe and the two were gone in an instant.

"Alright dear, we're next," Molly told Hermione. She held out a red vase, and as Hermione grasped hold of that, the two were off behind Ron and Mad Eye.

"That only leaves us," said Kingsley. "Are you ready?"

Harry nodded. "Not really, but yeah."

Kingsley held out a leather glove. "It's cool that the minster of magic is my chaperone," Harry smirked. Kingsley half-smiled. "It's hard to believe I'm the minister of magic. So hard to believe, I doubt it is even true." He winked at Harry. Harry gave Shacklebolt a weird expression but the glove was thrust into his hands and the two were off with a tug behind the navel.

They landed directly between the sofas in the Gryffindor common area. Mrs. Weasley and Hermione were heading upstairs, Ron was probably in the boys' room, and Mad Eye was looking at the entry way into the common room, probably trying to find ways that people could sneak in.

"Honestly, do you think I'd let some intruder in?" The Fat Lady asked when Mad Eye opened the portrait hole and looked out into the hall.

"Wouldn't be the first time," Mad Eye growled. The Fat lady "Hmphed!" and was quiet, but you could almost feel the anger leaking off of the back of the canvas as Moody re-closed the portrait.

Harry began to take his things up to the common room, leaving the chaperones downstairs to talk about security measures. He and Ron began unpacking their belongings and began to head back to the common room when they saw Hermione across the way right before the entry way to the common room. She had a finger over her lips and was waving for them to stay still.

"Honestly Moody!" Molly gasped. "Hogwarts is about the safest place on Earth. I trust that Dumbledore will have taken care to make sure every precaution is being taken. You've checked this place how many times in the past few weeks? It's safe!"

"You can never be too careful!" Moody stressed.

"You're the one who insisted they go to school anyway! I was perfectly fine with them all staying here and safe!"

"They can't be cowards, Molly! They'll have to learn to fight sooner or later! There's a war going on!"

"They are still children, Moody."

"Don't you remember the last time? The fighting isn't reserved for the adults. Children, eager to follow in the footsteps of their parents, are willing to do anything to be death eaters. At least here they shouldn't have so many problems as they will during a real battle. Call this battle practice. They can deal with their classmates now, and be more prepared to fight the real warriors later!"

"I can't believe you would throw them into the midst of this nonsense! They should be somewhere safe!"

"I'm trying to make this a safe place! You were just badgering about that."

"Sure they are safe against what is out _there!_ But what about the dangers from their own classmates?"

"They are going to truly understand the meaning of vigilance in a short time, Molly. Potter! Weasley! Granger! Stop lurking in corners and come out to say good bye!"

Hermione looked guiltily at the other two. "I don't know how, but somehow I forgot about his eye!" she whispered to her companions.

The three walked into the main common room. "Well, if you heard what we were saying," Molly said, "then I can't stress enough to you the importance of staying safe."

"We'll be very careful, mum," Ron said.

"Where did Shacklebolt go?" Harry asked.

"He had to go back to the ministry on important business," Mad Eye said.

"Remember, constant vigilance!" And as he and Molly grabbed the vase, they were off once more back to Grimauld place.

The three hung around for a while, Hermione insisting that they begin reading their books for the school year. Ginny joined them not long after, giving Harry a long gleeful smile before taking another armchair and settling in with the fifth year potion's book.

"Well," Harry said, placing his Transfiguration book on the table nearby, "I have an odd occurrence to tell you about." Ron and Hermione eagerly looked at Harry, ready for him to spill.

"Should I leave?" Ginny asked politely.

"No need," Harry said. "You're more than welcome to stay."

Ginny smiled back at him in appreciation and closed her book as well. Harry then related the brief conversation he and Shacklebolt had had. "He _winked_?" Ron asked in disbelief. "Are you sure it's not a person who drank polyjuice potion?"

"For one thing, Kingsley doesn't have hair," Harry stated. "For another, he was in Grimauld place, and since he arrived on his own he had to know where it was located. So I'm pretty sure it was him."

"Well, he is the minister, whether he believes it or not," Hermione stated. "I don't know why you thought his behavior was odd. I am a bit shocked he was elected as well."

"What do you mean?" Harry asked.

"Well, he has little experience in politics for one thing," Hermione stated. "Few people outside of the ministry really knew he was."

"Well, not many people voted, did they?" Ron asked. "Everybody was too scared to go because of threats of attacks by You-Know-Who at the polling places!"

"So I guess you can kind of assume the only people who voted were already in the ministry," Harry stated. "And the people who weren't kicked out because of suspicious behavior would have trusted him enough to vote for him. So I suppose it's not as far of a stretch as you think."

"Maybe not," Hermione stated. She picked her book back up and continued to read.

A few hours later, the four went down to the dining hall and mixed themselves into the group of the returning Gryffindor. There were whispers in the crowd as they saw Harry. "Hey! He's back after all!" "Look there he is!"

The crowd made their way to the table, and Harry was aware of stares from every corner of the Great Hall, including the faculty table. The most burning stares, however, were from the Slytherins across the hall. They wouldn't dare try anything with Dumbledore right at the front, it would be after that the real dangers occurred.

The doors opened and the first years walked into the Great Hall, small and amazed at the sights of the Great Hall, more wonderful than their siblings and parents had expressed. The best sight to them , however, was that of Harry Potter at the Gryffindor table. Some smiled, some blushed, some snarled, and some looked at him with puzzled expressions. A couple looked simply clueless as to who Harry was and why everyone was staring at him so earnestly.

McGonagall stood in front of everyone and greeted them, holding the Sorting Hat for all to see. "First off, I would like to welcome all of you returning students, and I hope we have a… nice year. Secondly, I would like to welcome our First Year Students! As we prepare to sort, I would like for you to remain respectful."

She began calling names from the list, and one by one the new children were sorted into their houses. The ones who snarled at Harry were all sorted into Slytherin, he was sure.

"I have a few words to say before we begin this feast," Dumbledore said in his stern yet somehow comforting voice. The entire hall became quiet as everyone turned to face the headmaster. "While the outside world will indeed influence all of your lives, I will ask you to please leave personal feelings toward occurrences outside of these walls from the classrooms and the hallways of Hogwarts. I do not want anyone to get hurt, and I do not want to send anyone away. But I will do what is necessary. We are at war, and while I do not want to sugar-coat the facts for you, I do want to shield you as much as possible from danger. The only way I can do that is if you cooperate with me. Now, enjoy the feast!"

The wonderful spread of food appeared in front of the students, and they all eagerly reached for the center of their tables. Harry shot a nervous glance in the direction of the headmaster, who winked at Harry as he turned back to the others at the teachers table. "He can't really expect a speech like that to keep the Slytherins from trying to follow in their parents' footsteps, can he?" Ron asked.

"Absolutely not!" Hermione spoke up. "I think it's just a final warning that's all. Sort of a last effort to keep students from making a mistake that they might end up regretting later."

"I hope some people listen," Harry whispered, shooting a glance toward the Slytherin table. He caught the eyes of Draco Malfoy, who snarled back as if a pit bull fixed upon his prey.

"This is gonna be a great year," Neville muttered from beside Harry. The trio heard the dread within his voice. They all knew that this truly would be a harsh year for all of them.

On their way back to the common rooms, Harry felt the stares of nearly every student upon his back. "I can't stand this anymore," he whispered to Ron and Hermione, who were on either side of him. "I can feel their eyes burning into the back of my head." With that, he turned down a random corridor and dodged quickly out of sight of the oncoming students. Ron and Hermione lost track of him, as he moved quickly and suddenly, his reflexes much quicker than theirs from years on the Quidditch field. He knew that he just had to wait a little while for everyone to retire into their bedchambers. Then he would sneak back inside of the common rooms and go to bed himself.

A sound behind him made him turn quickly and pull out his wand. His face met with a fist that smashed into his nose as he heard the crunch of cartilage and his eyes filled with tears. "Expelliarmus!" someone yelled, and his wand flew uselessly to the floor. He couldn't see who his assailant was, he only struck out and connected with someone's chin. Monstrous arms wrapped themselves around his and held him up by the armpits. Harry was lifted up to face Crabbe and Malfoy. He had almost known that it was them to start with anyway. Another punch to the side of his face dislodged his glasses from the bridge of his nose. Harry kicked up with his legs and struck Malfoy right between the legs so that Malfoy doubled over in pain and landed on the ground. Using his elbow, Harry tried to jab Goyle in the ribs to hopefully break something and get away. Unfortunately, the only thing he hit though was a thick layer of muscle-covered fat. Goyle threw Harry away from himself and right into Crabbe, who grabbed Harry's left arm and twisted it in such a manner that it snapped. For the second time in his life, he experienced the pain of a broken arm—not at all pleasant for anyone who has ever experienced it. Malfoy regained his feet and turned on Harry. Punching wildly into the dark haired boy's face. Harry made a few swings in Malfoy's direction, at one point boxing Draco in an ear. Three on one is by no means fair, however, especially when a wizard is without his wand. Within moments, Harry was left, nose and various other body parts bleeding, crumpled up on the floor as footsteps backed away.

"Tell anyone what happened, and I'll kill the little Chinese girl in her sleep," Draco hissed before turning away.

'This year is going to be torture," Harry thought grimly, before a final kick from someone behind came to his tail bone, breaking it and knocking him unconscious.

A/n: First update in a long time. Tell me what you thought!


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